Surprise! Ridiculously Restrictive Transfusion Threshold of Zero Associated with Death
BOSTON, MA - In a truly eye-opening study published in the New England Journal of Medicine, the results of which no one could have predicted, a ridiculously restrictive transfusion strategy (hemoglobin threshold <...
So Rude: Patient Has the Audacity to Code at Shift Change
ORLANDO, FL - In one of the most selfish acts of which Gomerblog has heard in recent memory, a 72-year-old male patient admitted last night to the 43 med-surg unit of Orlando Medical Center...
Breaking: Buick Undergoes Surgery for Glove Compartment Syndrome
ATLANTA, GA - Stuffed to the gill with unpaid parking tickets and losing Lotto tickets, a Buick in the hospital parking lot is undergoing emergency surgery for glove compartment syndrome. Though the case is...
Review: Lesser-Known Variants of the Precordial Thump
The precordial thump is a technique by which a health care professionals thumps the chest of a patient in ventricular fibrillation or pulseless ventricular tachycardia when a defibrillator is not present. It has a...
PyeongChang Update: Shirtless Tongan Hospitalized with Hypothermia
PYEONGCHANG, SOUTH KOREA - Sadly, we knew it was bound to happen: Tongan athlete Pita Taufatofua, also known as the Shirtless Tongan, has just been rushed to Seoul National University Hospital (SNUH) for what...
Full-Strength Aspirin Now 331 Milligrams to Adjust for Inflation
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The Food & Drug Administration (FDA) in conjunction with the U.S. Department of the Treasury have reported that they have increased a full-strength aspirin to 331 mg after adjusting for an...
Want to Throw the Kitchen Sink at Your Patient? It Now Comes in IV...
PARAMUS, NJ - Leaky Ivy Pharmaceuticals announced that the increasingly popular Kitchen Sink will now be available in an IV form. Reported Dr. Remy Kade, CEO of Leaky Ivy. “Throwing The Kitchen Sink at...
True to Its Name: Life Savers Prevented 3 Million Deaths in 2017
CLEVELAND, OH - A survey conducted by the National Institutes of Health (NIH) has gotten everyone's attention as it revealed that Life Savers hard candies were responsible for preventing the deaths of 3 million...
Patient Admitted with Life-Threatening Butthurt Exacerbation
CHICAGO, IL - "Move people, this guy's crashing!" EMTs yelled, asking everyone to get out of their way as they aggressively carried 33-year-old Alexander Touchy-Feely into one of the trauma rooms so treatment could...
New Study Explores If More Cowbell Is The Key To Improving Sepsis Outcome
NEW YORK, NY - An old treatment for sepsis-related fever is emerging as a potential alternative to the current sepsis bundle regimens, according to a new study by Dr. Chris Walken of Columbia University.
The...
