Tuesday, April 16, 2024

Endocrinology

diabetes

Hospital Adds Sugar Cubes to Diabetic Diets, Patient Satisfaction Higher Than A1Cs

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KEARNEY, NE - Whether due to a prank, sloppy oversight, or disgruntled kitchen workers’ act of spite, but loads of sugar cubes appeared on diabetic trays at Kearney Local Medical Center (KLMC) this morning....

Cinnabon Creates New Insulin Rolls: Insulinabons

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SEATTLE, WA - American purveyor of cinnamon rolls and diabetes, Cinnabon has announced a new tactic to combat the obesity epidemic, not by changing its recipe but by offering free insulin rolls instead.  Cinnabon...

Physician Recruitment Ad Statements and What They Really Mean

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Ad text Actual meaning Established medical center is a state of the art, modern, newly renovated hospital   The MRI works 12 hours out of the week, and the cost of that new fountain in the lobby will...

Fancy Medical Terms and What They Really Mean

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Nurses and doctors use fancy words to communicate and sound smart before patients, families and each other. Having spent most of his adult life in the hospital, Livin La Vida Locum, M.D. shares the...

Local Man Cures Diabetes After He Refuses His Insulin

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SEATTLE, WA – After years of obesity, a high calorie diet and limited exercise Mr. Krendall presented to his local ED after feeling, “crappy” for  “a while.”  Krendall had a fasting blood glucose of 512...

Tips: How to Keep Your Necktie Nice & Colonized‏

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So who doesn’t love neckties?  Not only do they strangle your windpipe, but they also spread disease with reckless abandon.  Cheers to that!  Here are some of our favorite ways at GomerBlog to help...
allergy

Local Woman Insists Her Diabetes a Bad Allergic Reaction to Fast Food

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HOUSTON, TX - Rhonda Jones, a 43-year-old woman reportedly insists that her diabetes is just a bad allergic reaction to a steady diet of McDonalds, Burger King, and Taco Bell, and not a systemic, potentially...
blood sugar rises after Halloween

Overnight News: Nation Has 107 Point Average Rise in Blood Sugars After Halloween

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - The Surgeon General, Dr. Vivek Murthy, reported that the nation’s average blood glucose level rose over 107 points per human last night during Halloween as 1.8 trillion tons of candy were...
diabetes medications in food

McDonald’s Introduces Value Meals With Cholesterol and Diabetes Medications Blended In

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BOCA RATON, FL - In a landmark move being hailed as "a potential solution to the obesity epidemic" plaguing the U.S., the McDonald's Corporation announced the bold decision to blend diabetic and cholesterol prescription medications...

Obese Americans in Love with New 5K-to-Couch App

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - Swimming in a large sea of running apps helping to get people active and create runners out of previous non-runners is a lone game-changing app that is slowly gaining momentum and,...