Thursday, April 25, 2024

Internal Medicine

New Intern Hands Attending Cup of Urine on Rounds

2
CHICAGO, IL – New medical Intern, Dr. Alexa Friedrich, disappeared after presenting a patient to her attending physician.  She has been desperately trying to impress her attending.  The group thought it was odd she...
discharge summary

ICU Transfer Arrives with Hospital Summary on a Napkin

84
SALT LAKE CITY, UT - An 83-year-old man was transferred to the University Hospital Critical Care Unit from an outside hospital on Tuesday, with a small napkin describing relevant aspects of his 14-day course. The ICU...
blood

Patient Bleeds to Death, Blood Bank Paperwork Completed Without Errors

3
MADISON, WI - GomerBlog regrettable reports about another surgical patient bleeding to death at Community Hospital yesterday.  84-year-old Terrance Billingsworth tragically passed away in the operating room while undergoing an abdominal aneurysm repair. “Blood started pouring out everywhere,”...
pathology tumor board

Pathology Resident Makes Up Disease at Tumor Board, Groundbreaking Discovery

6
CHICAGO, IL - A second-year pathology resident, Dr. Daniel Platt, is being credited with discovering a new tumor following a presentation at his hospital's tumor board.  "To be honest, I lost track of what I...

Medical Specialties as Game of Thrones Characters

72
As all medical specialties try to gain control of the hospital, we've narrowed down who their characters are: Cardiology, you poor tortured soul with a horrible life. Let's be honest, you got yourself into this.       ...
ebola virus

Ebola Virus: I’m Really Uncomfortable with All This Attention I’m Getting

0
Good morning, American citizens.  Let me introduce myself: I'm the Ebola virus. PLEASE!  Calm down, calm down and please allow me a few words.  I would really like to get a few things off my...

Man ‘Accidentally Falls’ on Gerbil That Ran Through Lube

4
MEMPHIS, TN – A local resident presented to the emergency room with an unusual complaint this evening.  Chief complaint: "My bottom really hurts." At first he was reluctant to say anything.  "He told me his bottom hurt,"...
joint commission

Joint Commission is Coming: Hospital to Change Everything for Three Days Then Revert to...

0
EVERY HOSPITAL, USA - Hospital administrators have finally cracked the secret to passing the highly-dreaded Joint Commission inspections.  For decades, the Joint Commission (JC) or previously called JACHO, but don't EVER call them that now...
radiology

CDC Warns of Emerging Disease Deemed ‘Panniculolithiasis’

21
ATLANTA, GA - The CDC has issued an advisory regarding a new disease being reported sporadically across the country.  There have now been over 250 confirmed cases of what the agency has named “panniculolithiasis.” The...

Doctors Getting Nursing Degrees to Stay Competitive

39
BOSTON, MA - Nurse Shannon Wilkens on floor 4 West thought she saw someone she knew in scrubs walking into room 414.  "He was tall, I swore he looked familiar.  Our charge nurse informed me he was recently...