Pneumatic Tube System for Patient Transport a Huge Success
ROCHESTER, MN - One month into its experimental trial run, the Mayo Clinic made an announcement today that the implementation of a pneumatic tube system for patient transport has been achieved with great success.
Mayo...
Archeologists Discover Ancient Disability Papyrus
GREECE - Last week on the Greek island of Lesbos, a team of archaeologists unearthed a primitive disability papyrus signed by Hippocrates himself in 405 BC. Many believe the papyrus to be the first recorded...
New OpenBed Medical App May Revolutionize Hospital Visits
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - The makers of OpenTable, the world’s leading provider of dining reservations online, have released a new healthcare-based website and medical app called OpenBed, which may revolutionize the future of hospital...
After Binging on Pizza and Beer, Local Man Claims to Have Gluten Allergy
BERKELEY, CA – Local resident Charles Longfellow is no stranger to beer. “A typical weekend I’ll go through a couple cases,” he told reporters boastfully.
This 36-year-old male has been living the same weekend for the...
Archaeologist: Ancient Group Claimed Drinking Clean Water Caused Diarrhea
A landmark discovery in southern France occurred this Saturday: scientists uncovered a series of caves that may have been inhabited by humans over 15,000 years ago.
"The most remarkable thing about this cave are the writings...
New York Outlaws MRSA
ALBANY, NY - New York legislators recently passed a new law that outlaws MRSA (Methicillin-resistant Staph aureus) in the state of New York. This new law will make it illegal for one to have MRSA...
Hospital’s Electronic Health Record to Be Replaced by New, Efficient ‘Paper Chart’ System
NEW YORK, NY – Citing slow load times, confusing menu structure, and overall frustration with the user interface, St. Barnaby’s Hospital has announced that the old electronic health record (EHR) will be replaced with a...
Responding to E-Cigarette Trend, American College of Medicine Releases Guidelines Recommending Natural Cigarettes
PHILADELPHIA, PA - The electronic cigarette (e-cigarette) craze has swept the nation, with modest beginnings several years ago leading to annual sales now surpassing $1 billion. Initially heralded as a clean alternative to smoking tobacco,...
