Physician Recruitment Ad Statements and What They Really Mean
Ad text
Actual meaning
Established medical center is a state of the art, modern, newly renovated hospital
The MRI works 12 hours out of the week, and the cost of that new fountain in the lobby will...
Fancy Medical Terms and What They Really Mean
Nurses and doctors use fancy words to communicate and sound smart before patients, families and each other. Having spent most of his adult life in the hospital, Livin La Vida Locum, M.D. shares the...
Endangered VA System Named 60th U.S. National Park
WASHINGTON, D.C. - In an effort to preserve one of the United States' most endangered areas for future generations, President Obama signed a law making the Veterans Health Administration (VA) the 60th National Park...
State Medical Board Disciplines Dr. Oz by Forcing Him Back to Clinical Practice
NEW YORK, NY - In a stunning conclusion to an ongoing debate about the future of Dr. Oz, the state medical board investigating him announced that they have agreed on the proper reprimand for...
Protamine Shortage Amid Strike at Salmon Sperm Acquisition Factory
DALLAS, TX - Add another to the list: protamine. This antidote to heparin is on national shortage and warnings are being issued to hospitals nationwide.
Protamine comes from the sperm of salmon. At the largest...
Brian Williams: I Performed the First Heart Transplant
NBC - Reports have recently surfaced that NBC news anchor, Brian Williams, claimed to have performed the first heart transplant in 1967. In a broadcast in 2001 about then Vice President Dick Cheney's heart,...
New Super Duper Minimally Invasive Transurethral Aortic Valve Replacement Gaining Popularity
NEW HAVEN, CT - Patients across the country are calling their doctors at all hours asking to be scheduled for the newest minimally invasive surgery, SuDMITAVR, which stands for Super Duper Minimally Invasive Transurethral...
Anesthesiologists Compare Arm Tans While Surgeon Repairs Penetrating Aortic Injury
ATLANTA, GA – As local trauma surgeon Dr. Andre Mackersie desperately tried to gain control of a massively exsanguinating abdominal aortic gunshot wound, the anesthesiologists on the other side of the sterile drape were...
Elephant Complains of Chest Pain ‘Like a Human Sitting on My Chest’
NEW YORK, NY - At approximately 6:00 AM this morning, a local elephant named Eli the Elephant developed excruciating ten out of ten chest pain “like a human sitting on my chest,” with radiation...
