If Elected President, Dr. Ben Carson Plans to Continue Use of PAs & Impenetrable...
BALTIMORE, MD - Dr. Ben Carson’s campaign for President is gaining steam, so much so that last week his physician assistant spokesperson needed to...
Neurosurgeon Replaced by 4th Year Medical Student due to Massive Number of Research Publications
An attending neurosurgeon in central Ohio was replaced by a fourth-year medical student due to research production. MS4 End O’Scopit was interviewing for a...
Fake News: Tiger Wasn’t Pulled Over for DUI, He Was Post-Call
PALM BEACH, FL - Reports have surfaced that CNN's original claim that Tiger Woods was arrested for driving under the influence are false. It...
Amidst Obesity Epidemic, Task Force Creates Glasgow Food Coma Scale
ATLANTA, GA - In response to the public health crisis of food comas resulting from the ongoing obesity epidemic, the 3N Joint Task Force,...
Crooked Hillary Actually Suffering From Severe Scoliosis
CHAPPAQUA, NY - Former Democratic Presidential Candidate Hillary Clinton’s Spine Surgeon today revealed that President Donald Trump’s calling her “Crooked Hillary” on the campaign...
Doctor Has Pseudoseizure to Avoid Patient with Pseudoseizures
TAMPA BAY, FL - Zelda Wilkins credits her “high pain tolerance” as the only way she can handle her affliction with pseudoseizures. Despite frequenting...
General Surgeon Moves Clinic to Operating Room, Cites Excessive Patient Consciousness
CEDAR RAPIDS, IA – Jacob Townsend, a 53-year-old general surgeon, has decided to permanently move his clinic to the operating room due to ongoing...
Neurosurgery Resident Doesn’t Recognize Own Child at Thanksgiving Dinner
NASHVILLE, TN - Although aware how busy he is, the family of second-year neurosurgery resident Dr. Michael Duke planned a dinner to celebrate Thanksgiving...
NC Hospital Offers Discounted Craniotomy with ATV Purchase
WINSTON-SALEM, NC - With hunting season fast approaching, a North Carolina hospital has made a controversial move: they have partnered with an ATV dealership...
2015 Guidelines for Altered Mental Status Published
The American Academy of Neurology (AAN) has updated their guidelines for managing altered mental status (AMS) patients coming into the emergency department.