Thousands Dead in Battle Between Ophthalmologists and Optometrists
WASHINGTON, DC - Thousands of eye care providers were found dead in the streets Monday morning after a vicious battle erupted between ophthalmologists and optometrists in our nation’s capital.
The two groups share a long...
Ophthalmology Resident Consulted to Put Glasses On
Rapidly responding to his third page for acute onset vision loss from the ED, third year ophthalmology resident Dr Wobleski stepped into the eye lane, picked up Ms Johnson’s glasses from a nearby table,...
Ophthalmologist Accidentally Agrees to See Inpatient Consult
Richard Thompson, a local ophthalmologist, was appalled to discover that he had accidentally agreed to see a patient currently admitted to local Mercy Hospital on Tuesday.
"I don’t really know how it happened,” reports Thompson....
NASA: New Planet Discovered with Equatorial Volcano and Rivers of Lava
WASHINGTON, D.C. - In a news conference held early this morning, NASA astronomers announced they have discovered a new planet next to Pluto with features unlike Earth or any other planet discovered to date. The...
Retina Specialist to Further Subspecialize and Focus on Cones
NEW YORK, NY - Realizing that the ophthalmologic world of retina is still way too vast with its ten layers, retina specialist Jacob Vitreous has decided to further subspecialize by focusing not only on one...
Road to the Final Four Best Lifestyle Medical Specialties
INDIANA - After another exciting and grueling March Madness Hospital Edition, with some upsets and bracket busters, the Final Four Medical Specialties with the Best Lifestyle have been determined. Once again the solid #1...
Rand Paul’s Medical Credibility Lowered to Jenny McCarthy’s Level
KENTUCKY - In a shocking statement released today by Rand Paul, a well-respected Kentucky senator and ophthalmologist, he believes vaccines can lead to "mental disorders" and most should be "voluntary." In an exclusive interview...
Intern Places Wrong IO Access, Gets Intraocular Access by Mistake
AUSTIN, TX - In yet another case of medical “whoops-a-daisy” late last night, intern Alex Franklin mistook his supervising resident’s order to obtain emergency IO access during a cardiopulmonary arrest for intraocular access, and...
Bob Costas’ Eye Infection Starting to Get Infected
SOCHI, RUSSIA – Famous sports anchor Bob Costas has been plagued by a recent eye infection. The infection started in his left eye and has moved over to his right eye. This frustrating infection has...
Ophthalmology Resident Quits Due to Ommetaphobia
MIAMI, FL - Dr. Henry Flickheimer, an ophthalmology resident, has struggled and coped with a certain intense fear for years. Surprisingly, that fear is the fear of touching or looking at eyeballs, otherwise called ommetaphobia.
“It just...
