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Scientists Discover Infant Colic Actually Baby Fibromyalgia

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MINNEAPOLIS, MN – Researchers at the Center for Research in the Young (CRY) finally unlocked the mystery of infantile colic, discovering the condition is actually the baby presentation of fibromyalgia.

APGAR 10, baby fibromyalgia
“Wahhhh… Make my pain stop… wahhhhh!!!”

Colic is defined by infant crying at least three hours per day, at least three days per week, for at least three weeks.  If the babies can survive this period, without being shaken to death, they typically outgrow their symptoms by four months of age.

Rheumatologist Dr. Amanda Ache led this groundbreaking research in the baby fibromyalgia project.  She noted similarities between her fibromyalgia patients and her own colicky baby.  “My precious infant seemed to have a heightened sensitivity to touch and noise, wanted to sleep throughout the day, and was in a complete ‘fibro fog.’  We tried massages, physical therapy, stretching exercises, and dietary changes, none of which made any improvement in her symptoms.  But I really knew I was onto something when I realized spending more than 10 minutes with her piercing cry made me want to grab a kitchen knife and jam in into my ears… That’s exactly the way I feel when I’m with my some of my patients!”

Until now, treatment for infant colic included supportive management aimed at helping parents cope with the child’s symptoms.  But with this groundbreaking discovery of baby fibromyalgia, numerous additional therapies can now be found ineffective as well.

Parents everywhere expressed relief with this new diagnosis.  “When I tell people that my infant has ‘colic’ I always get the same eye roll.  It feels so good to finally have a legitimate diagnosis: baby fibromyalgia.”

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