• 48.9K
    Shares

BOCA RATON, FL – The longstanding practice of anesthesiologists having to scratch surgeons in the operating room has now become codified into law.  Effective next month, anesthesiologists will face the threat of 5 years jail time and a $100,000 fine if they refuse to rub their fingernails against a surgeon’s body when commanded to do so. 

surgeon
“What is the blood pressure, and can you scratch my left cheek?”

Area anesthesiologist Dr. Sri-Sheshadariprativadibyankaram relayed his many qualms about this requirement to Gomerblog by telephone.  “I’ve been scratching surgeons at their beck & call for years, but now this has gone way too far.  I mean, I had a surgeon who demanded that I offer my scratching services to his groin area.  It was awkward, even with the use of a sterile scratching stick.”

Dr. Sri-Sheshadariprativadibyankaram continued, “And things can get pretty hairy.  One time when I was working on a case with this same surgeon, a patient flatlined on the operating table, and I still had to simultaneously resuscitate the patient, scratch the surgeon’s left buttock, and manage the musical playlist for the entertainment of the surgeon.  It’s just too much.”

The surgeon, when contacted by Gomerblog to comment on these incidents, only offered the following statement: “I like bones.”

  • 48.9K
    Shares
Dr Pablo Pistola
Dr Pablo Pistola had become increasingly dissatisfied with satisfaction-based forces in medicine. He felt like a doctor without a purpose. He subsequently embarked on a 7 year twerking quest in the Himalayan foothills to find his true calling. During this journey, he realized that he has a secret talent: his immense knowledge about women. He understands them. Legend has it that he can size up a woman’s soul in a mere instant. He didn’t ask for these powers. But with great powers come great responsibilities. So Dr Pablo Pistola (double-board certified in Love Medicine & Romance Medicine, with fellowship training in Seduction Medicine) has been dabbling in satirical erotic writing. And if satirical erotic writing can offer a viable exit strategy from medicine, then the world will be a better place. His responsibility is to bring the stories of lust to you. He also is an avid life-long Miami Heat fan. Follow him on twitter at @drpablopistola
WordPress › Error

There has been a critical error on this website.

Learn more about troubleshooting WordPress.