shoulder pain

How Not to Answer Doctors’ Questions

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This statement: Is not a helpful answer to this:
Uber. What brings you in today?
It’s in the computer. What is your PCP’s name?
While I was talking to Aunt Suzy. When did you symptoms start?
In Chicago. Where does it hurt?
12/10. How would you rate your pain?
My aura felt warm. Any fever?
*Points to scars on abdomen.* Any prior surgeries?
A touch of diabetes. Any chronic medical problems?
One pink one, two blue ones, and some red ones. What medications are you taking?
Nothing.  (True answer: 12 supplements, acupuncture, herbal rubs, and psychic reading.) What have you tried so far?
A miracle cure.  But with no side effects and no changes in lifestyle. What were you hoping from today’s visit?

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