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second thoughts Da Vinci OB-GYN
“Yeah, I change my mind, I want a human OB.  And get me outta the hallway… NOW!!!!”

NEW YORK, NY – “It dawned on me as I had my legs apart and Da Vinci loomed over me with his intimidating red eye and multidirectional arms that I felt really vulnerable.”  33-year-old pregnant mother-to-be, Alissa Jones, shared this picture she took with Gomerblog in the hopes of dissuading other pregnant mothers from making the same very mistake she has just done.  “Now tell me: wouldn’t you feel a little bit uneasy in my position?”  It is unclear why Da Vinci chose to have her give birth in the middle of a busy hospital corridor.  Thankfully for Jones, despite the 40 weeks’ gestation, she was still quicker and more nimble than Da Vinci ever could or will be, and escaped to the care of an experienced, human obstetrician.  As for the multitudes who have seen the picture, the feeling is best encapsulated by passerby and ophthalmologist Dr. Glaucomflecken: “Good God, is this what having sex with Da Vinci looks like?”

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Dr. 99
First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.
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