Friday, April 19, 2024

Radiology

ambulance

Update: AHA Addends Recommended 90-Minute Door-to-Balloon Time for MI to Allow Cath Team 3...

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SAN DIEGO, CA—For the cardiac catheterization team at San Diego General Hospital, compliance with the 90-minute door-to-balloon time metric for STEMI patients is a significant source of stress and anxiety. Thus, team members enthusiastically...
mri scanner

Hospital Discontinues MRI Screening Forms, Press-Ganey Scores Soar

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In a presentation to the American Association of Gullible Hospital Administrators, Shady Practices Medical Centers reported that as a result of numerous satisfaction surveys, the organization has eliminated the screening practices necessary to get...
Roentgen X-ray clinical correlation

This Day in Medical History: Roentgen Invents Clinical Correlation

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THIS DAY IN MEDICAL HISTORY, 1895 - Did you that today on November 8, 1895, Wilhelm Conrad Röntgen (also spelled Roentgen) not only produced and discovered X-rays, but also created the first ambiguous radiology report? In...
couple kissing

Physician Foreplay 101: How to Seduce Your Doctor

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Seduce any doctor by using valuable information about his or her specialty to ensure total success in the bedroom. Emergency Medicine Go skydiving to get the adrenaline going.  Speed home.  Once there, run upstairs and cut...

New super powerful MRI machine causes transient reversal of earths magnetic poles but the...

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People across the globe were on alert last Monday after mysterious wide spread power outages and electronic failures. Chaos ensued in many airports and bus stations. One fourth of all flights were delayed across...

Local Doctors Refuse to Take Care of Nickelback, Cite Do No Harm

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DETROIT, MI - On Saturday at 3:14 p.m., Nickelback’s tour bus crashed into a herd of rouge elephants that had escaped from the now abandoned Detroit City Zoo.  All four members were brought to a local ER.  Their...
finall four medical

Road to the Final Four Best Lifestyle Medical Specialties

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INDIANA - After another exciting and grueling March Madness Hospital Edition, with some upsets and bracket busters, the Final Four Medical Specialties with the Best Lifestyle have been determined.  Once again the solid #1...
UberGURNEY

Uber Offers In-Hospital Patient Transport with UberGURNEY

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Uber’s success knows no bounds. After infiltrating cities across the world with their groundbreaking online-based transportation service, Uber is infiltrating hospital buildings with their new fleet of UberGURNEY vehicles, giving...

Fancy Medical Terms and What They Really Mean

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Nurses and doctors use fancy words to communicate and sound smart before patients, families and each other. Having spent most of his adult life in the hospital, Livin La Vida Locum, M.D. shares the...

Medical Student Struggles to Stay Awake During Radiology Rotation

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OMAHA, NE - Despite doubling up on his morning coffee, medical student Brad Haverford has found it exceedingly difficult to stay awake during his fourth-year radiology elective.  "I heard it was a really easy rotation,"...