FDA Approves 55-Hour ENERGY for Incoming July Interns
WASHINGTON, DC - In a major win for soon-to-be-exhausted incoming July interns at residency programs across the land, the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) has approved 55-hour ENERGY drinks effective immediately since improved work conditions...
Revised ASA Classification Tells You When to Lawyer Up
An expert panel comprised of ambulance chasing, blood sucking lawyers and that one snotty dude from med school published a revised ASA physical status classification this afternoon to reflect the increasingly litigious landscape of...
Women to be recruited into ortho with promise of no line for bathroom
The American Academy of Orthopaedic Surgeons has begun a new campaign to entice women to enter a career in orthopaedic surgery. Dr. David Bonaparte, diversity coordinator for the AAOS, believes the new campaign will...
Hospitalist Explains: Hip Fracture
Orthopedics can be complicated. Thankfully, Dr. Hal Dole, after passing his IM boards also completed a Fellowship in: Optimization, Restoration, Transition and Hyperalimentation of Organ Malfunction Emanating from Surgical Sequelae and Surprises: ORTHO-MESSS. There,...
Orthopedic Surgeon Accidentally Intubates Patient in OR
MANSFIELD, OH - In a bizarre reversal of fate, a local orthopaedic surgeon accidentally inserted an endotracheal tube into a patient’s airway while draping out the patient for a hardware removal.
Dr. Aricks Lunchbocks was...
Ophthalmologists Bracing Themselves for Full Day of Work After Solar Eclipse
SALEM, OR - Ophthalmologists throughout the country are bracing themselves for what could be an entire day of work immediately after the solar eclipse on August 21. Record numbers of people “seeing spots” after...
Breaking: 1 in 500 Can’t Smell What The Rock is Cooking
HAYWARD, CA - The Rock says it all the time: "Can YA SMELL-LALALALALALALLALALA-OWWWWWW what The Rock…. is cooking?!" But can everyone smell what The Rock is cooking? It turns out roughly 1 in 500...
Product Review: P90X Kegel Edition for Urinary Incontinence
Pros / Tony Horton's new P90X Kegel program can transform your pelvic floor muscles from flab to fab in just 90 days, curing incontinence for good and allowing you to laugh without pissing yourself...
New Surgical Jason Masks Loved by Nurses, Doctors
CRYSTAL LAKE - Nurses, doctors, and other health care practitioners across the nation have announced their overwhelming support for the newly-redesigned surgical masks or Jason masks. It is named after the brilliant trauma surgeon who...
Conversation Starters While Scrubbing For Surgery with Your Attending
Scrubbing before surgery can be an awkward time for residents who have to spend up to 5 uninterrupted minutes standing next to an attending while you both wash your hands. Casual conversation can be...
