Wednesday, April 24, 2024

Surgery

Da Vinci

Video Gamer Unlocks Da Vinci on Original Mortal Kombat

0
Nearly 25 years after its creation, professional video gamer Prasanth Malhotra has unearthed a never-before-seen character in the original Mortal Kombat: the Da Vinci surgical robot.  According to Malhotra, to unlock Da Vinci you must slowly...
wine for surgical prep

VIP Treatment Offers Merlot, Pinot Noir as Surgical Prep

0
MILL VALLEY, CA - As hospitals across the country merge into corporate conglomerates, they lose their identity, much like identical Walmarts taking out Mom and Pop shops, leaving poor residents without the ability to...
CPR dummy manikin

Breaking: Nurse Successfully Resuscitates CPR Dummy Back to Human Life

0
NEW ORLEANS, LA - In some incredible news, critical care nurse Margie Casamento at Tulane Medical Center became the first health care practitioner to successful resuscitate a CPR dummy (or CPR manikin) back to human life....
new starbucks drink

New Surgical-Themed Starbucks Drinks

0
The highly successful sales campaign of Starbucks Unicorn Frappuccino has got the Starbucks’ marketing team all fired up and ready to target another demographic of artisan beverage drinkers. “Now that a sizable number of children...
second thoughts Da Vinci OB-GYN

Pregnant Mother Having Second Thoughts About Da Vinci as Her OB/GYN

0
NEW YORK, NY - “It dawned on me as I had my legs apart and Da Vinci loomed over me with his intimidating red eye and multidirectional arms that I felt really vulnerable.”  33-year-old...

RN, MD Confused After Patient Requests Pain Med That Begins with an E

0
ATLANTA, GA - An inpatient health care team has been baffled all day by a patient’s persistent requests for pain medication, but it’s not your usual suspect.  The patient keeps asking for that pain...
external fixator

Ortho Stabilizes Stethoscope with External Fixator

0
LOS ANGELES, CA - Stating overwhelming concern over the flimsy nature of medicine colleague Louis Lefebvre's stethoscope, orthopedic surgeon Brock Hammersley has successfully stabilized it for now with an external fixation device or external...

Too Much Pressure: Masseuse Breaks All 206 Bones in Client’s Body

0
OKLAHOMA CITY, OK - Despite the request to use only light-to-medium pressure during a one hour deep tissue massage, masseuse Lindsey Wang has gone overboard and accidentally broken all 206 bones in her client Gabby...
pick picks picking brain brains

Neurosurgeons Warn Battle of Wits Carries 20% Risk of Brain Herniation

0
ROLLING MEADOWS, IL - Engaging in a battle of wits is associated with, among other things, a 20% risk of brain herniation, this according to a new statement released by the American Academy of...
meatball sub appendix

Patient Undergoes Successful Prophylactic Cardiac Resection

0
NASHVILLE, TN - A patient has undergone successful prophylactic cardiac resection at Nashville Medical Center today in a “very proactive effort" to mitigate any future chance of developing cardiovascular disease, Gomerblog reports.