VA Secretary Says Disney Doesn’t Measure Wait Times, So VA Shouldn’t Either: What Do You Think?

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“Is this the line for crushing chest pain? Good thing wait times don’t matter.”

Robert McDonald, the Veterans Affairs Secretary, recently compared VA wait times to Disney wait times, saying that Disney doesn’t use wait times as a measure of success so why should the VA.  Good point, Mr. McDonald.  It’s good to know the VA is in capable hands.  But we asked around the hospital to see what you were thinking.  Here’s what we found:

“The VA is just like Disney.  Minus the FastPass option.”
Dr. Lawson, General Surgeon
“I prefer the food at Epcot, the Dilaudid at the VA.”
Jason Redmond, Patient Who Can’t Afford Meds But Has a Sweet New iPhone 6s Plus
I tell my patients if they develop any life-threatening illness to report to their nearest Disney or VA, whichever is closer.”
Dr. Vasquez, OB/GYN
“How tall do you have to be to ride the VA?”
Brent Shoemaker, Second-Year Med Student
“Both involve roller coasters, but I prefer child vomit to adult vomit.  Less to clean.”
Jerome Jones, Environmental Services
  “If Mickey Mouse doesn’t measure wait times, why should Annabelle Rivers measure blood sugars?”
Annabelle Rivers, Sweet Little Old Lady with Poorly Controlled Diabetes Who Sometimes Talks in Third Person

First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.
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