CLEVELAND, OH – A recent multi-center observational trial involving several EDs in Cleveland have demonstrated that texting on one’s cell phone during an initial ED triage interview results in markedly improved clinical outcomes. The increasing ubiquity of cell phones among the population at these EDs have led some experts to claim that positive health outcomes are poised to soar among this frequently underserved cohort in subsequent years.
The results were surprising. Of the 850 patients who texted on their cell phone, all 850 were either discharged from the ED or admitted for 24 hours or less without a remotely serious medical or surgical condition being diagnosed. Among the 4150 controls who did not text on their cell phone, 18.4% (95% CI 14.5%-21.2%, p<0.05) ended up being admitted for more than 24 hours and 14.2% (95%CI 13.1%-15.0%, p<0.05) were diagnosed with a condition defined as “very serious or life-threatening.”
In the discussion section of the paper, the authors have a number of theories to explain this apparent correlation.
What they consider the most plausible theory is that the hand movement and cognitive function associated with texting must provide a therapeutic feedback loop to the brain resulting in a dopamine surge promoting instant healing. Another theory is that instead of texting, these patients are actually setting up YouTube to watch an episode of Dr. Oz (which we all know has healing powers). A further assertion is that users of their cell phones may be texting another medical provider for advice.
A final conjecture was that the phrases themselves may have healing powers. With consent of a subgroup of patients, analysis of the text messages was undertaken which showed a certain unspecified code was being used to communicate between users. A few examples of these utterances include lol, rotfl, omg, smh, and fml. Further studies will be needed to investigate the possible therapeutic potential of these phrases.
This study has engendered some controversy. One far-fetched and ludicrous claim by jealous academic know-it-alls is that there should have been a baseline comparison analysis between the texting-on-cell-phone group and the control group, as this may have led to a radical concept called, “selection bias.” It is notable that this possibility was considered but not analyzed in the study due to the fact the study author and author of this article wasn’t really paying attention when that… um…. part was discussed in their meeting because he was… uh… busy playing Words With… Friends on his, um, cell… thingie. Woo hoo! Triple Word Score!
If you enjoyed this article, please check out the author’s website First World Emergency Medicine for other great articles.
I’ve also found that eating flaming hot Cheetos in the waiting room helps to ease ABD pain.
My daughter was able to text barely out of anesthesia.
I love Gomerblog
I’m dying!! But first. Lemme take a selfie.
Well, she looked VERY healthy to me. The wonders of medicine – or was she the ER Triage nurse?
Kt Simpson
Omgosh!!! I charted just to that affect while working in triage today. Not only texting but answering and talking on the phone
Jennifer Holscher Ryan
Jenny Flanagan Carnagey
When I’m in triage I hang a poster that reads “When you’re done using your phone I’ll be happy to help you.” Still trying to figure out how to translate my sign into Spanish…
How about texting with a Mountain Dew and bag of Cheetos held between the thighs?
Pain is 10/10 but I still have perfect manual dexterity and state of mind to text.
Pain is 10/10 but I still have perfect manual dexterity and state of mind to text.
But I have found a negative outcome when texting during pelvic exams..usually they get some antibiotics
But I have found a negative outcome when texting during pelvic exams..usually they get some antibiotics
I love sending the pts home that came in with a suitcase!!
I love sending the pts home that came in with a suitcase!!
Could it POSSIBLY be that if they are feeling up to texting, then they’re not that sick to begin with?
I tend to be more crass and just say “you need to get off your phone”. I’m an ER physician who works in multiple states…I’m about sick of it…
When the phone comes out during triage I walk out of the room to give them their private then come back after 15 minutes, if they are still texting or talking I tell them ill come back to finish my triage when they are ready for me to deal with their emergency. This usually works. If not I keep getting mini breaks.
lol!!!
Ah “positive luggage sign” is a serious thing
I think I know why they are a healthier group-they have no discernible illness to begin with!!!
Lmao
I think the “study” left out the possible explanation that most patients who are texting at triage are less critical and less emergent to begin with. Many patients with true emergencies and/or pain do not feel well enough to text.
They need to do the same study correlating ED outcomes with patients who show up with either a teddy bear or a suitcase.
I had a pt texting during moderate sedation,while we were trying to pop that shoulder back..lol
I’m thinking this could possibly be the effect of the cherry koolaide IV the triage attendant gave her over the texting.
Lisa Lisa Susan Oliver
I think being unable to text (in under 30 yo pts) should be a triage modifier – inability to text = up one level of acuity
The worst are the parents who take selfies with their sick kids. Gotta get that Facebook sympathy somehow!
Waiting to see the doctor, LOL!!
Meaghan Fleschner Barry
Meaghan Fleschner Barry
Had a patient laying with his head slightly elevated and texting busily while spitting occ. his mother thought he was dying of epiglottitis..She was hysterical.
Had a patient laying with his head slightly elevated and texting busily while spitting occ. his mother thought he was dying of epiglottitis..She was hysterical.
My pain is a 10, hold on I have to text this picture.
My pain is a 10, hold on I have to text this picture.
But boy do they get mad when you say “I don’t want to interrupt you, so I’ll move onto the next person while you finish your conversation”.
But boy do they get mad when you say “I don’t want to interrupt you, so I’ll move onto the next person while you finish your conversation”.
A local hospital is offering a “check out” system for chargers. Like a library. smh.
A local hospital is offering a “check out” system for chargers. Like a library. smh.
Kim… Sonya – Another day at the office!
Kim… Sonya – Another day at the office!
:) )))
:) )))
:) ))))
:) ))))
Hahaha! I think I would theorize that these patients have positive outcomes because they weren’t really that sick to begin with.
Hahaha! I think I would theorize that these patients have positive outcomes because they weren’t really that sick to begin with.
Serious? How annoying!
Serious? How annoying!
Carra Brandley Aimee Wilde
Carra Brandley Aimee Wilde
Brittany Isom Desi Kyriakopoulos Cordell Dave Kritner Andrea Walls Harrell Jennifer Ryder Medlin Chrystal Guiles Martin Shae Mosley Colton Fortner
Brittany Isom Desi Kyriakopoulos Cordell Dave Kritner Andrea Walls Harrell Jennifer Ryder Medlin Chrystal Guiles Martin Shae Mosley Colton Fortner
Billie Jo Grieve
Billie Jo Grieve
So should the ER provide free cell phone chargers when the wait time exceeds battery like or is there a “charge” for that? Guess we might need an ICD-10 code for texting in ER also.
“I might die from this gun shot but first, a selfie!”
Fareen Zaver
Had a patient who got shot in the trauma bay couldn’t hardly participate in his own triage because he was texting through a fight with his girlfriend who didn’t believe he was shot.
Though I did have a PT who had been shot, texting calmly at the desk
All day every day. The life of a triage nurse.