orthopedic surgery

Breaking News: Orthopedic Surgeon Completes 1000th Surgery with EBL of 50 cc

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NEW YORK, NYGomerBlog is ecstatic to bring you breaking news out of OR 7 today at University Medical Center.  Dr. Stewart Shoemyer, a prominent orthopedic surgeon who specializes in total joints, completed a total hip arthroplasty with an estimated blood loss (EBL) of only 50 cc.  This amazing feat was Dr. Shoemyer’s 1000th consecutive surgery with an EBL of 50 cc.

orthopedic surgeryShoemyer is expected to give a speech tonight with some keys phrases to include “excellent surgical precision,” “God-like reflexes,” and “not mortal” with of course “massive props to the Striker reps.”

“Simply incredible,” stated anesthesiologist Dr. Emily Ruekers as she was hanging a 300 ml cell saver bag along with 2 units of PRBCs just to top things off.  “To consistently have so many total joints with EBLs of 50 is something unheard of.  Congrats Dr. Shoemyer.  Here’s to another 1000!”

Critics were quick to point out that although EBL has been reported to be 50 cc every surgery, 28% of patients have required 2 units of PRBCs, 15% have required 4 units of PRBCs, and 5% have required massive transfusion protocols postoperatively.

Shoemyer chalks the discrepancy up to anesthesia providers having too low a trigger for transfusion, such as ectopi or ST depression, and poor post-operative management by medical teams on the wards.

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  • Avatar
    Jacqueline Schoen

    Christina Marie Breaux

  • Avatar
    Paul McMullen

    Kipp Gould

  • Avatar
    The Happy Hospitalist Blog

    A Happy Hospitalist original!

  • Avatar
    The Happy Hospitalist Blog
  • Avatar
    Danny Deasis

    So will everyone else in the hospital

  • Avatar
    Paige Nicole

    I beg to differ.

  • Avatar
    Danny Deasis

    I merely quoted pnw lololol. I never said it. I think we’re the nicest in the hospital bahahaha

  • Avatar
    Paige Nicole

    That’s the truest thing YOUVE ever said. For real

  • Avatar
    Danny Deasis

    “God like reflexes” “They’re also the biggest douche bags in the hospital” -PNW

  • Avatar
    Paige Nicole

    “Not mortal”

  • Avatar
    Danny Deasis

    1000 iv fluids every. Single. Time.

  • Avatar
    Paige Nicole

    Danny Deasis

  • Avatar
    Dylan Birkett

    Robert Whittington

  • Avatar
    Marita Kruger

    Rinesh Chetty

  • Avatar
    Angela Tama Zang
  • Avatar
    Dhruv Verma

    These are friggin hilarious.

  • Avatar
    Brad Worldclass Stahlheber

    Hahaha! Simply amazing!

  • Avatar
    Riley Winham

    haha I’ve seen several claims of 25cc after total knees. 25cc all day for me

  • Avatar
    Nabir Babbar

    Phillip Sussman

  • Avatar
    Sarah Kohrmann

    Riiiight ;) lol

  • Avatar
    John Cloud

    Riley, this better be you!

  • Avatar
    Stephen Rockower

    “It was dry when we closed”

  • Avatar
    Stephen Rockower

    As an orthopaedist, I ALWAYS have less than 50cc blood loss! Just like the great doctor described in the (news) article!!!

  • Avatar
    Martin DeGravelle

    I don’t feel like I’m working unless I lose 150cc Lora Ann Cullipher

  • Avatar
    Jenn Hayes

    Katie Anderson

  • Avatar
    Natalie Smith

    Stephanie Joelle

  • Avatar
    Angi Clark

    lol. What is it about EBL that makes them all hallucinate?? Nevermind the puddle of blood down the drapes and on their shoes! 50cc’s or bust!!

  • Avatar
    Saad Mohammad

    You know it’s bad when they say 150 instead of 100

  • Avatar
    Megan DeLoera

    Russell Wilson

  • Avatar
    Sarah Kohrmann

    That EBL is consistently underestimated… I thought that was clear lol

  • Avatar
    Jayy Cee

    Always.

  • Avatar
    Tamara Jones

    That’s just dilutional anemia Jayy!!

  • Avatar
    Jessica Leota

    The OR is like Las Vegas- what happens there, stays there…

  • Avatar
    John Muthama

    Lol. Blame anesthesia as usual.

  • Avatar
    Nurse K

    @TheWellnessLife haha even I remember everyone on ortho had EBLs of 50cc…hilarious

  • Avatar
    Jayy Cee

    Flawless victory every time. Hb from 13—–>8 post up day 1.

  • Avatar
    Lora Ann Cullipher

    Martin DeGravelle

  • Avatar
    Nate Poulson

    If the hemoglobin is above ten call me when it’s a liter and then I might be interested.

  • Avatar
    Jeremy Patten

    Haaaaa!!! Sounds accurate to me!

  • Avatar
    Debbie Sheffield

    Darryl B Thomas. LOL

  • Avatar
    Emily Valler

    They were “oozing” a little, right Josh ? lol

  • Avatar
    Kristina Wehnke Rosu

    Christina Elizabeth

  • Avatar
    Linda K Lagassie

    I didn’t even have to read the article to know if like it

  • Avatar
    Zane Moore

    Anesthesia running those fluids wide open

  • Avatar
    Marci Delaney

    @edokiyahousman

  • Avatar
    Jane Thomas

    truth

  • Avatar
    Mark Casino-Brown

    dilutional

  • Avatar
    Stephen Rockower

    And the point is?

  • Avatar
    Caitlin Blanton Foxley

    even when the hb drops by 2-3 grams post-op :-)

  • Avatar
    JoAnn Sigismondo

    THIS IS HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!! EBL for totals = 50, Lap chole = 10, hernias = 5, urology=0 (doesn’t matter what the case is, can’t measure anyways!)

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