CME: Do You Know the Laws of the House of God?

Samuel Shem’s medical classic The House of God was written in 1978 and follows a group of medical interns during their first year of residency training.  As a struggling intern, Roy Basch learns from The Fat Man the Laws of the House of God.  Do you think you know the Laws of the House of God?  Test yourself below!

According to the First Law, what don’t gomers do?

Dance

Die

Dodge

Duck

Correct!

Wrong!

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The Second Law states that gomers go to where?

Gas station

Georgia

Ground

Guantanamo Bay

Correct!

Wrong!

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The Third Law addresses cardiac arrest. What is the first procedure?

Call in sick

Hide in a closet

Make sure your crash cart is updated

Take your own pulse

Correct!

Wrong!

-

Finish wording the Fourth Law: The patient is the one with the __________?

Dementia

Disease

Diarrhea

Dilaudid

Correct!

Wrong!

-

According to the Fifth Law, what comes first?

Pan CT

Peace

Placement

Pressure ulcers

Correct!

Wrong!

-

The Sixth Law addresses body cavities. What pair of items do you need to reach one?

Hope & luck

Power drill & blindfold

#14G needle & good strong arm

Javelin & Dad

Correct!

Wrong!

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What formula forms the basis of the Seventh Law?

10 Out of 10 Pain + 10 Out of 10 Pain = 20 Out of 10 Pain

Age + BUN = Lasix Dose

NSAID + Lasix = Dialysis

Pain Score Divided by 100 = Troponin Level

Correct!

Wrong!

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The Eighth Law: They can always __________ you more.

Embarrass

Hurt

Love

Tickle

Correct!

Wrong!

-

What does the Ninth Law say is a good admission?

A dead one

A drug-seeking one

A malingering one

A nice one

Correct!

Wrong!

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What is the Tenth Law of the House of God?

If you don’t check labs, you can’t hold up placement

If you don’t take a temperature, you can’t find a fever

If you don’t take a pulse, you can’t find an arrhythmia

If you don’t see the patient, he or she can’t yell at you

Correct!

Wrong!

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The Eleventh Law refers to medical students: Show me a BMS (best medical student) who only __________ and I will __________.

Doubles my work; massage his back

Triples my work; kiss his feet

Quadruples my work; caress his face

Quintuples my work; marry him for better or for worse

Correct!

Wrong!

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According to the Twelfth Law, if a radiologist resident and the medical student both see a lesion on the chest x-ray, then what?

All is right with the world

Both need an ophthalmologist

There can be no lesion there

There must be a lesion there

Correct!

Wrong!

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For the Thirteenth Law, what forms the basis of the delivery of good medical care?

ICD-10

Hospital administration

Patient satisfaction surveys

To do as much nothing as possible

Correct!

Wrong!

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