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WASHINGTON, DC – After a close 38-to-35 vote, the leaders of the American Nurses Association (ANA) voted to eliminate the nursing diagnosis from nursing notes and electronic health records.  There will no longer be a need or requirement for nurses to complete a nursing diagnosis for their patients.

nursing diagnosis
“Maybe now we can actually take care of our patients instead of filling out a useless nursing diagnosis!”

“Our nurses have spoken, and most felt the nursing diagnosis was a waste of time and kept many nurses from actually attending to their patients,” said ANA spokeswoman Meredith Fiddelsmith.  “It was only a matter of time before we had to just admit that the nursing diagnosis didn’t actually mean anything, nor could the hospital bill extra for them despite all the time it took to place the document in our electronic health records.”

“Geez, when I was stacked with 6 patients or more, the nursing diagnosis really bogged me down,” said RN Matt Greeveters.  “I was able to craft a solid nursing diagnosis in the chart, but by the time I charted them all in the EHR, I ran out of time to actually see my patients before I was getting calls to deliver food to patient’s family members.  That was NOT part of my diagnosis or plan by the way!”

“At first I was excited to do the nursing diagnosis that I had learned in school,” stated RN Rebecca Mattingly.  “Once I realized that NOBODY read my perfectly-crafted notes, I asked myself why did I just waste my time?”

NANDA International was shocked to hear the news and was in the process of developing a nursing diagnosis.  Actual diagnosis was “pissed off big time.”  Risk diagnosis was “at risk for losing a job.”  Plan to intervene by developing other nuisances for nurses to chart.

Anticipate an appeal process to begin within the year, but for now enjoy slightly less charting!

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