haldol delivery system

Haldol Blowdart Halted in Phase 3 Clinical Trial Due to ‘Safety Concerns’

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MORRISTOWN, NJ – Recognizing the mounting need for new and creative ways to quickly administer haloperidol (a typical antipsychotic drug) to that “difficult” patient, Big Pharma Pharmaceuticals (BPP) outside Morristown, NJ had planned to release “HalBlow” in the 2nd quarter of 2016.

haldol delivery system
“Everyone out of the way!!  Incoming HalBlow!”

A single haloperidol dose of 10mg IM comes pre-loaded in a one-time use cylinder that the treating physician, PA, NP, CRNA, RN, CNA, RT, or dentist simply has to take aim and fire with a decent puff of air.  “The blowdart’s auto-injector takes care of the rest,” stated lead researcher Dr. Mick Dundee, PhD.  “The clinician can remain safely hidden behind an overturned commode or medication cart while the drug takes effect and the patient drifts off to sleep.”

Much to shareholders’ delight, the new drug delivery system sailed through the animal testing phase where, after a brief safety tutorial, clinicians found they could easily drop a fully grown charging male baboon from 10 feet, or approximately the distance from the hallway to a patient’s bed, with a quick blast of air through the end of the blowgun.

Dundee explained, “Ideally the ‘problem’ patient is struck with the dart in an area of exposed neck or perhaps the buttock.  But, quite honestly, the drug delivery system is designed to be able to penetrate clothing and even a lunch tray if the patient has opted to use one as a shield.”

Unfortunately when the “blowdart” format of the drug was compared head-to-head to more standard administration techniques such as direct IV or IM injection by a nursing professional, some safety concerns were raised.  “Look, no drug delivery system is perfect, there is a learning curve with this product,” Dundee stated, alluding to a recent incident at a trial site where 3 orderlies and two cafeteria workers were incidentally sedated by “Halblow” missiles before the individual in question was eventually subdued.

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  • MD aware… no action taken

    Dr. “MD aware… no action taken” was born in a small town just outside of a big town. He graduated last in his class from grade school, high school, college and Med School so he was forced to become a surgeon. Knowing that one’s late 20s and early-to-mid 30s are generally overrated he decided to spend that time focused on becoming mildly overweight while removing various organs in the middle of the night from Americans that were also overweight. A living testimony to Einstein’s “definition of insanity”, he went on to become a specialist where he performs the same operations over and over with expectations of a different result. His accolades include having received 1 “thank you” note after several years of practice!

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