In a unanimous vote Thursday, Lakeland General Hospital’s administrative council decided to replace traditional designations on name tags with more “descriptive” names for easier identification.
“With the growing diversity of the medical team and allied health staff, it’s important to help our patients keep track of who is who,” says Aimee B. Lyon, spokesperson for the hospital’s PR department. “Our new designations will help do just that.”
As with most things, the new changes are met with some skeptics, but, overall, the response has been overwhelmingly positive.
“I love the new designations,” says third-year medical student Q.T. Patootie, whose name badge now reads “Teeny-Tiny Whipper-Jipper”. “Now no one confuses me with the nurse or janitor. They have no idea what I’m supposed to do, which is how I feel most days.”
“I think it’s high time this was put into effect,” says Dooah Lott, whose title has been changed from “Charge Nurse” to “The Big Kahuna”. “Gives more credit where it’s due.”
Other changes include “Physiotherapist” to “Muscle-icious”, “CCAC” to “Not Your Housekeeper”, and Resident to “Witty-Bitty Baby Doc-y”.
Medical consultants have had their names replaced, too. Surgery is now known as “The Big Snip-and-Sew”. Obstetrics is “Making Birthdays Everyday”.
Gastroenterology is, perhaps, the most descriptive: “Super-Duper Poop ‘n’ Scopers”.
Be on the lookout for these novel changes in a hospital near you!