medical student adorbs CAGE questionnaire infectious enthusiasm

Med Student Excited to be First Assist for Turkey Carving This Thanksgiving

  • 1.5K

ST. LOUIS, MO – While many medical students will be spending Thanksgiving at home with their families, third-year medical student (MS3) Brent Tryhard has other plans.  Attending surgeon Dr. Scal Pel has asked Tryhard be to be his first assist during turkey carving this year.

medical studnet“I think Dr. Scal Pel really likes me, he gave me honors during my surgery rotation because I was so good at standing out of the way, so I guess it’s natural he chose to give me more responsibility,” said an excited Tryhard.  “I’ve been reading up on turkey anatomy and different approaches for the carving.  I think the posterior approach would be best, but we’ll see what Dr. Scal Pel says!”

When asked for comment, Dr. Scal Pel said, “My turkeys are a masterpiece as long as Anesthesia doesn’t mess anything up, and a first assist lets me give maximum attention to the carving while giving minimum attention to my family.  Normally I’ll get a resident to assist, but Tryhard was such an inconspicuous medical student, I thought I’d give him a shot.  Who knows, if Tryhard impresses me, I might even let him try an open reduction and internal fixation on the wishbone.”

Sources confirm that the turkey is to be made NPO at midnight, with IV saline infused with basil leaves running wide open to prevent dryness during the oven portion of the procedure.

  • Show Comments

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

comment *

  • name *

  • email *

  • website *

You May Also Like

Lazy Eye Not Even Trying to See

141SharesTALLAHASSEE, FL – In an embarrassing show of pure slothfulness, the right eye of ...

tree pollen

Tree Pollen Levels So High, Trees Themselves Begging for Allergy Meds

778SharesATLANTA, GA – It’s not just humans sneezing this spring.  According to area allergists, ...

premortem autopsy NPO after midnight autopsy

Pathologist Gets Head Start with Premortem Autopsy

348SharesATLANTA, GA – Inspired by the Food & Drug Administration’s recent approval of postmortem ...

Surface of Mercury Less Toxic Than Hospital Work Environment

1.6KSharesWASHINGTON, DC – Scientists at the National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA) have analyzed ...