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NEW YORK, NY – Newly-minted interventional radiology attending Dr. Marcus Jones scored a personal victory today when he successfully mended a leaking pipe leading to his kitchen sink using only dental floss and chewing gum. Jones says he was washing the dishes like normal when he noticed a significant amount of water gushing from under his sink. Rather than opening up the cabinet and assessing the situation first-hand, he suspected it would be easier and more efficient to fix the issue with a more “minimally invasive” approach.

“Instead of opening up the cupboard and making a mess of everything, I figured I could use the faucet as an access point and fix the whole thing without making a mess,” Jones proudly stated. He claims he was able to find the leak in the pipe and fix it all with his sense of “feel” after he threaded a piece of chewing gum hooked to 30 feet of generic dental floss through a small opening in the faucet.

He then proceeded to embolize the leaky pipe with the gum. “Looking back, the only thing that could have made it easier to fix would be if I had some sort of CT scanner in my kitchen. I could have injected contrast into the faucet and used a fluoroscopic technique to mend the leak,” Jones continued. He says he is not sure if it is a permanent fix, but should more leaking present, he is prepared to access the leaky pipe via the bathtub drain in the adjacent room.

Dr. Jones says he is now exploring options for using the electrical outlet plugs in his apartment as “access points” to complete other home projects. He is also prepared to help neighbors with any plumbing or electrical issues, stating that he is sure he could access any of their homes from the comfort of his bedroom. He says his long-term goal is to be able to access various points in the city from his apartment.

Dr. Shadowgazer
Avoiding sunlight and human interaction at all costs, Dr. Shadowgazer spends most of his time staring at images of peoples’ insides on a computer screen in the deepest depths of the hospital. He is a master of indecision which proves incredibly helpful when recommending clinical correlation. Follow him on twitter @DShadowgazer