Valium Advent Calendar Being Tested by Local Pharmaceutical Company

  • 3.3K
    Shares

SALT LAKE CITY, UT – Parents will be able to count down the days until Christmas in a much more soothing manner this season. A local pharmaceutical company has started distributing advent calendars filled with Valium, a medication known for its calming effect commonly used in treating anxiety.

According to Ann Ziety, the CEO of the pharmaceutical company, the calendar works the same way as traditional ones. Customers will open a surprise on each day of December, but instead of chocolate each box contains increasing doses of Valium. The calendars are already on backorder as early sales have been record-breaking.

“We just thought it would add a little fun and good cheer for parents this Christmas” Ziety told GomerBlog. “It’s all about the kids nowadays, and parents get so stressed!” A problem with the product, however, is that parents often become impatient and want to open all the boxes on the first day.

Karen Smith, a high-strung mother of 10, is one of the first customers. “It is absolutely perfect” she told us, “I can’t wait to open up my little treat each day!” She has already bought calendars for all of her friends. Smith said she was considering making her own year-long advent calendar to continue on after the holidays, but then realized she already has a pill box.

Ann Ziety says the company has already started testing out cannabis brownies to leave for Santa next season, claiming that it could help him relax as he tries to piece together those thousand-piece self-assembly Christmas gifts that all kids seem to love.

image_pdfimage_print
  • Dr. Shadowgazer

    Avoiding sunlight and human interaction at all costs, Dr. Shadowgazer spends most of his time staring at images of peoples’ insides on a computer screen in the deepest depths of the hospital. He is a master of indecision which proves incredibly helpful when recommending clinical correlation. Follow him on twitter @DShadowgazer

  • Show Comments

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

comment *

  • name *

  • email *

  • website *

You May Also Like

JCAHO Changes Recommendation After Evidence Found to Support Recommendation

761SharesOAKBROOK TERRACE, IL – During a recent Joint Commission Board meeting, it was discovered ...

Breaking News: Da Vinci Robot Becomes Sentient, Terrorizes City

3KShares NEW YORK, NY – In breaking news, NYU’s da Vinci Surgical Robot became sentient ...

Medicine Consulted for History and Physical

8.4KSharesIOWA CITY, IA – The University of Iowa Orthopedic Department has gone “all-in.”  At 13:36 ...

hospital crash cart

Updated 2016 Hospital Crash Cart Recommendations

18.3KShares ATLANTA, GA – The crash cart is indispensable during cardiopulmonary arrest.  However, their ...

anesthesia patient

National Security of Anesthesiologists Releases New Cell Phone Disabling Device

1.6KSharesRESTON, VA – The National Security of Anesthesiologists (NSA), in response to a jury ...