Dab

MS3 Responsible for Additional 50cc Blood Loss During Surgery for Doing ‘The Dab’ Instead of Dabbing Blood

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AKRON, OH – After working in academics for over 20 years in Gynecology, Dr. Marshall thought she had seen it all. But a whole new level of stupid walked into the room on May 8, 2019, whom we will call Medical Student #584 (MS584)

“I was performing the initial incision for an abdominal hysterectomy, and a small amount of bleeding was noted,” says Dr. Marshall. It was at that point that she asked the 3rd year medical student to “go ahead and dab.” Perplexed by such an interesting request, MS584 froze in place.

As the blood very slowly but steadily continued to ooze, Dr. Marshall for a second time asked “Please dab!” MS584, still frozen in place, looked around and noticed all eyes were on him. Time stood still for MS584.

“DAB!!!” barked Dr. Marshall. With a bit of uneasiness and overwhelmed with the desire to follow the commands of his attending physician, MS584 performed the quickly popularized, but notoriously infamous dance move “The Dab” in front of the entire OR staff.

As the room erupted in laughter, the young student came to the horrific realization of what he had just done. He slowly lowered his now contaminated arms to his sides and stepped back from the OR table. What many now consider a mercy kill, Dr. Marshall excused MS584 to go study in the library for the rest of the day.

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