Surgeon General: Attorney General’s Progress Note Copied Directly from H&P

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Surgeon General Jerome Adams released his opinion in a press statement that Attorney General William Barr “simply copied relevant portions of the admitting H&P in making his progress note.”

In a meeting with reporters, the Surgeon General cited his years as an anesthesiologist to support his conclusions. “It’s a classic move – using a thorough H&P to complete the first progress note – it’s especially tempting when the administration wants the notes written ASAP,” Adams commented.

“However, most of the time it is evident that a proper assessment was not made after a quick review of the situation,” Adams continued, “which was clearly the case with the Attorney General’s recent progress note.” Adams explained that “expectant management” of an “obstruction” is not AG-level work.

Adams states that he requested the Attorney General to deliver a presentation defending his assessment and plan. “This is a routine request, but Barr is requesting more time to review the case.” Barr said that his final case presentation shouldn’t be expected for weeks.

Adams suspects that the delay is due to Barr “carefully determining how to scale the screenshot of the UpToDate management algorithm just right so that no one could possibly read it off the PowerPoint slide.” Adams explained that this is another classic move he’s seen hundreds of times.

Adams states that he remains interested in the case at the center of this story, noting “There is evidence to suggest that this particular case is the ‘patient zero’ responsible for multiple rapid deteriorations of otherwise stable status in the D.C. area.”