• 1.3K

ATLANTA, GA – The CDC released new guidelines today to to help ration COVID-19 testing kits. They now ask to refrain from testing for the novel coronavirus, or COVID-19, unless you are “critically ill or famous.”

“We just don’t have enough testing kits for everyone with a ‘really bad’ cold or cough,” CDC Director Robert R. Redfield told reporters today. “It’s unfortunate because these people we are turning away are probably infecting a dozen more people.”

He went on to say that “we don’t want to waste a testing kit and take away from someone that is critically ill, or famous.”

Ideally the medical community should be testing many, many more people to help aid in the spread of COVID-19. If a mildly symptomatic patient test positive they could then quarantine preventing any more spread. Unfortunately there just isn’t enough testing kits or nasal swabs.

“Please think of this before you go to the doctor,” Redfield stated. “Call your doctor’s clinic to get an idea of your risk profile for testing, and your famous profile.”

“Do you have lung disease? Asthma? COPD? Diabetes?” Redfield listed off risk factors health professionals should consider. “Were you in a blockbuster movie? In that movie did you have more than 3 lines? How many Instagram followers do you have? Are you a professional athlete? These are the questions we should be asking.”