PICU nurse

PICU Nurse Enjoys Changing Patient Parameters and Drips Right Before Interns Present Patients on Rounds

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SEATTLE, WA – In an exclusive interview with Nursing magazine, Martha Stevens, a prominent pediatric intensive care unit (PICU) nurse at Children’s Hospital admitted that she loves to mess with new medical interns, especially ones she can’t stand.

PICU nurse
So many drips and parameters to change…

“One of our favorite things to do is to change patient IV drip rates, ventilator settings, ins and outs, and other medications after the interns have rounded, BUT before they present to the entire ICU team,” said Stevens.

“The hopeless look on their face as we chime in to correct their numbers is priceless.”

Stevens went on to say that she only does this for interns that really stick out as conceded and arrogant.

“Interns that treat nurses with respect and bring us cookies will not have any adjustments to their patients before they present.  Get on our bad side, and you’ll look like an absolute fool at rounds.”

One intern in particular made Stevens’ blood almost boil every time she saw her.  She went on to describe how the morning played out.

“This particular intern was despised by all, even the other ‘terns.  She was notorious for interrupting turnover at 7 a.m. and for stealing the medical chart.  I decided to really get her good.  I changed every drip rate, recalculated all ins and outs, called respiratory therapy to change every ventilator parameter, obtained numerous ‘new’ labs, and even paid microbiology $50 in girl scout cookies to give me the bacterial culprit for the patient’s infection – all AFTER she had made her rounds.”

On rounds the gunner intern was corrected on every number and system that she presented.  Her attending thought she was a complete fool and sent her to the diabetic podiatry clinic as punishment.  Tears were reported to be dripping onto her new fancy pediatric stethoscope as she sauntered away.

“That was almost as exciting as untangling IV lines from patients coming form the operating room,” said Stevens.  “I look forward to hiding consult notes from her next week.”

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    Jennifer Spring Athnos

    Guys… this entire site is nothing but SATIRE articles. Satire, as in jokes. As in exaggerated silliness. As in pretend. THE ENTIRE SITE, including this article. Since everyone's claiming to be a brilliant, dedicated, oh-so-professional critical care nurse, how about showing that you have some semblance of a personality or sense of humor too? These. Are. Imaginary. Articles.

  • Avatar
    Nwando Ikenna-Okafor

    The Facebook link just shows the article. So excuse me @ bob

  • Avatar
    Nwando Ikenna-Okafor

    No need for the duh! If u click on the Facebook li

  • Avatar
    Christina Anderson Barnhill

    I know it is satire. I also think it's funny, not because it was actually done (it wasn't) but because sometimes we (medical professionals) think about doing such things to amuse ourselves. I love that she called respiratory to make the vent changes and didn't do it herself. And yes, the missing Dr. found in respiratory therapist's trunk was one of my faves.

  • Avatar
    Melissa Wicklin

    Michelle… This is the reason NO ONE takes nursing seriously

  • Avatar
    Michelle Adams

    Munachiso Bob-Ume What the H_ _ is wrong with these people??? Purportedly educated individuals that have no clue as to what humor is… Libs?

  • Avatar
    Michelle Adams

    Good grief people, who removed all the funny bones around here? Keep up the great work Gomerblog!!!

  • Avatar
    Michelle Adams

    Melissa Wicklin Take yourself a little too seriously, huh?

  • Avatar
    Munachiso Bob-Ume

    Lol it's a satire website duh…they are fake stories. Found them funny tho

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    Astria Johnson

    Oh wow that can't be legal!!!! And she should have her license revoked and criminal action taken against her for messing with patients..that who is suffering in the end with her messing with their drip/vent settings..this place is scary

  • Avatar
    Melissa Wicklin

    Satire or not…ridiculous.

  • Avatar
    Megan Shirk

    No residents were injured…..It's a medical satire site. They also wrote a piece about a resident being found in a respiratory therapists trunk

  • Avatar
    Nwando Ikenna-Okafor

    That can't be legal. Who ordered those changes ?

  • Avatar
    Mary Beth Hinkle Grove

    Miss- I've always been so impressed w your talent as a nurse- miss you!

  • Avatar
    Ali Ruckstuhl Klug

    Totally agree with you Missy! I would never do that! Why would this person even write or admit to this? Especially on social media… Hope she doesn't need a job!

  • Avatar
    Melissa Wicklin

    Also a PICU nurse and would NEVER purposely make someone look stupid. It's hard enough to work there as it is. It must be a really different place where you work.

  • Avatar
    Dana Musselman

    Karma is a ______! 2 wrongs never make a right. 18 yrs in PICU and nurses don't have the authority to make those kind of changes. Using your patients for revenge or to make a point is a horrible practice.

  • Avatar
    Tracie Tugwell Bishop

    OK – I was really worried

  • Avatar
    Steven Duffel

    That entire site, and all the stories it contains, is satire. Read a few more and you'll understand.

  • Avatar
    Tracie Tugwell Bishop

    his has to be the most insane act I have ever heard of. This could have life/death consequences on SO many levels. Why must she jeopardize patient lives and careers of people who have worked very hard to get there. This lady needs to be turned in to her State Board of Nursing, at the minimum.

  • Avatar
    Gomerblog

    Maybe you can eat for free? We have advice for that

  • Avatar
    Connie Chiles

    I guess I don't find this quite as humorous as you do. I am a nurse and no matter how much someone irritates me, I would never behave like that. I'd like to think I'm much more professional than that.

  • Avatar
    Matthew T. Eaton

    God why did you have to post that. I’m working in the CCU next month, lol.

  • Avatar
    Yvonne LaBrecque Flynn

    "Conceited", not "conceded".

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