Lub Dub

Cardiologist Names Newborn Daughter Lub Dub

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ATLANTA, GA – After much deliberation but with much excitement, cardiologist Randy Duckett has announced that he and his wife have chosen a name for their beautiful newborn 6 lb. 12 oz. daughter: Lub Dub.

Lub Dub
“Is that a duck? No, it’s Lub Dub Duckett!”

“It’s perfect,” explained Duckett to friends and family who politely nodded in silence.  “Ever since she was born yesterday morning, she’s made my heart skip a beat.  And considering I’m a cardiologist, it just fit like a hand into a glove.”  Duckett went on to ask everyone rhetorically if anyone could possibly think of any better names.

They could.  They could think of a like a thousand of ’em.

“Look, I totally get that he and his wife want some sort of cardiac theme going on with the naming, I get that,” confided Duckett’s father, Paul Duckett, to Gomerblog.  “But Lub Dub?  As in Lub Dub Duckett?  I can’t be the only one that thinks that’s silly sounding.”

According to the Duckett family, there were several names in the running.  Asa was one, though that was passed upon because it sounded more like a boy’s name.  Plavix was another, but many agreed it sounded better as a dog’s name.  Paul Duckett was rooting for Pradaxa because it had a “futuristic regality” to it, while his wife Amy (Lub Dub’s grandmother) was rooting for Joy Valerie because it sounded normal yet formed the initials JVD to appease Randy the cardiologist.  Ultimately, Lub Dub came out on top.

“My wife and I almost decided on Diurila but it sounded too much like gorilla, so we passed,” explained Duckett.  He gazes into Lub Dub’s eyes.  “Just look at our little bundle of His… I mean joy, bundle of joy.”  He laughs as he cradles his daughter.  “Man, am I a nerd or what!”

  • Dr. 99

    First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.

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