Dr. 99 Dr. 99

First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.
Big Bad Wolf

Wolf Huffs and He Puffs and He Blows Anesthesia’s Drapes Down

LONDON, ENGLAND – A confrontation has broken out between the Big Bad Wolf and ...

cocaine enthusiasm

Med Student Attributes Wide-Eyed Enthusiasm to Cocaine Use

NEW YORK, NY – Internal medicine attending Lauren Stevens was really impressed with her ...

routine blood work urine A-fib B-minus

Not Impressed: Cards Downgrades A-Fib to B-Minus

BIRMINGHAM, AL – Completely unimpressed by his patient’s routine ECG this morning, cardiologist Paul ...

colonic mudslide

Manual Disimpaction Gone Awry: Med Student Buried in Colonic Mudslide

PHOENIX, AZ – A frantic search and rescue is underway after third-year medical student ...

hypothalamus

Unable to Fix Office Thermostat, Neurosurgeon Removes Own Hypothalamus

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Talk to any health care professional and they’ll tell you that ...

aisle 9 home depot

Breaking: Orthopods Spotted in Aisle 9 of Home Depot

FORT MYERS, FL – In breaking news here at Gomerblog, a herd of orthopods ...

nurses station

Study Finds No Nurses Station Exists With 1:1 Ratio of Computers to Chairs

BOSTON, MA – A landmark study published in the Just-Like-New England Journal of Medicine ...

code doorframe

RN Shocked Code Isn’t Etched Somewhere on Door, Doorframe

PHILADELPHIA, PA – Confronted with a locked door with an electronic keypad, a nurse ...