Dr. 99 Dr. 99

First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.
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Busted: PT Caught Taking Elevator Down One Flight

ASHEVILLE, NC – In breaking news to Gomerblog this morning, an extremely embarrassed physical ...

Diaper City: Storm Cloud Incontinent of Water

OKLAHOMA CITY, OK – Embarrassed that it has once again woken up in the ...

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IT Requires EMR Password to be 500 Characters Long

BOSTON, MA – Reflecting what is soon-to-be standard practice at all health care systems ...

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Meteorologists Developing Radars to Detect Black Clouds, White Clouds

ATLANTA, GA – In a new strategic partnership with Emory University, meteorologists at The ...

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Search & Rescue Team Saves Anesthesiologist Buried Under Drape Avalanche

DALLAS, TX – Search and rescue operations are underway to locate anesthesiologist Kelly Doolittle ...

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Breaking: Ortho Declares War on Sticks & Stones

ROSEMONT, IL – The American Academy of Orthopaedic Surgeons (AAOS) has officially declared war ...

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Breaking: Anesthesiologist Suffers Life-Threatening Sudoku Withdrawal

NORFOLK, VA – Beloved anesthesiologist and master of puppets Dr. Thomas Kingston is currently undergoing ...

Too Much Pressure: Masseuse Breaks All 206 Bones in Client’s Body

OKLAHOMA CITY, OK – Despite the request to use only light-to-medium pressure during a one ...