Dr. 99 Dr. 99

First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.

Man Takes Care of Vinyl Records Better Than Himself

AUSTIN, TX – A 33-and-a-half-year-old Austin man has been observed to and openly admits ...

So Sad: Charcoal Inactivated, Made DNR

BIRMINGHAM, AL – Telling a palliative care team that it lived a long and ...

medical student nodding

Dedicated Med Student Spends One Hour Listening for Bowel Sounds

AUGUSTA, GA – Indicating to one and all he is dedicated to this internal ...

abdomen

NIH Close to Uncovering Elusive Fifth Abdominal Quadrant

BETHESDA, MD – Sensing a breakthrough is imminent, scientists at the National Institutes of ...