white coats White Coat Investor

Diversification Fail: White Coat Investor Invests Only in White Coats

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OGDEN, UT – Gomerblog reporter Naan Derthaal rocked the medical financial universe recently when he revealed that the White Coat Investor doesn’t wear a white coast while investing.  Well, get ready for another bombshell: the White Coat Investor invests only in white coats!

white coats White Coat Investor
Only 0.00000001% of the white coats he owns

WHAT??!!

It turns out the man behind the moniker, Dr. James M. Dahle, doesn’t practice what he preaches.  Sure, he advises us to work hard, keep a modest lifestyle, and “live like a resident.”  But you know what a resident doesn’t do?  Invest in white coats.  A sh*t ton of them.

Gomerblog crack staff has found that the White Coat Investor invests exclusively on white coats and has been doing it for decades.  And it’s the same white coat too: a Landau Men’s 3-Pocket Full-Length Lab Coat in a size 42.  We need to have someone independently verify the tally, but we estimate that he has invested in over 3,412,000 white coats.  That’s right, 3,412,000 Landau Men’s 3-Pocket Full-Length Lab Coats, all in size 42.  Not one in size 40 or 44.

So much for diversifying one’s portfolio.

The White Coat Investor may talk about the importance of investment diversification and how it mitigates risk, but in reality this is what his portfolio looks like: 100% white coats, 0% stocks, 0% short-term fixed income, 0% long-term fixed income, and 0% real estate.  And since Landau is a U.S.-based company, it looks Dahle has 0% in foreign investments.

We haven’t verified this yet, but we suspect that the White Coat Investor must also invest in large airplane hangars to store all those white coats.

That’s a lot of white coats.  Geez.

If the bubble on white coats bursts, the White Coat Investor is in for a world of hurt.  Here at Gomerblog, we sincerely hope those white coats are made of the highest quality cotton so they can help soften the blow.

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