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A Visit from Doc SUPER USER

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Twas the night Before Go Live, And no LIP was in the house

No one was home yet, They were all with their mouse

They clicked and they copied, Working on charts all alone,

In hopes that someday Their notes would be done.

 

Their children were nestled All safe in their beds

While visions of their HIPPA compliant, easily assessable

Records Danced in their heads

 

And mom with her Mac, And I with Haiku,

Had just settled down With prescriptions to renew.

When out from my InBox, There arose such a clatter

I checked My Messages, To see what was the matter

 

And there in my EPIC window I saw like a flash

Many NEW RESULTS to address, And I threw up in a dash.

The screen glared on my chest, I was chilled like new fallen snow

I would NEVER be finished, This was really a low blow.

 

When what To my blurry eyes, should appear

but a HYPERSPACE sleigh and little tiny reindeer (say wha?)

With a little ole driver So lively, No loser

I knew in a moment he must be a SUPER USER

 

More rapid than Express Lane, His courses they came

As he whistled And shouted, And called Out by name:

“Out, Pencils; Out, Paper; Out, Epic 2017

Now GO LIVE, New Epic, Go two-oh-eighteen.

 

From outpatient offices, To inpatient halls,

Now update-away; Update-away; Update-away all

So up to the rooftop, The courses They flew

With a sleigh full of ELF SCRIBES And DOC SUPER USER too

 

And then In a twinkling I heard on the roof

Typing and clicking from each little hoof

As I drew in my head And was turning around

Down the chimney DOC SUPER USER came with a bound

 

He was dressed business casual, from head to his foot,

complied with dress code, With nary ashes nor soot

A bundle of Smart Phrases, He had flung On his back

And he looked so relaxed, As he opened His pack

 

His eyes how they twinkle His manner, so cool

He said: “I’ll explain EMR’s; I’m Doc Super User; no fool.

APRN’s do all my work, I bill for their time,

Elf Scribes finish my charts, It’s all so sublime.

 

My In Basket is empty; Results all reviewed,

Billing compliant; I’m 200 percent RVU’d.”

A wink of his eye And a twist of his head

Soon gave me to know, I had something to dread

 

He said: “I brought you New Epic; Now go; get back to work.”

He updated all the workstations. Then he left. What a jerk !

An laying his middle finger, Along side his nose

And giving a nod, Up the chimney He rose

 

He sprang To his sleigh, To his Scribes gave a whistle

And away they all flew Into Hyperspace, Like a missile.

But I heard him exclaim As he drove out of sight

“Happy New Epic y’all, At least, I’ll have a goodnight !”

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