PVC piping

Santa Gives Good Ortho Intern 1000 Feet of PVC Piping for Christmas

  • 406
PVC piping
Orthopod heaven

PHILADELPHIA, PA – Boy, do we have a true feel-good story for you this Christmas.  Orthopedic intern, Bryce Bonebreaker, learned he did in fact make Santa’s Good Orthopod list when he unwrapped all his gifts under the Christmas tree and found it contained over 1000 feet of polyvinyl chloride (PVC) piping, which was just what he wanted this holiday season.

“I’m a kid in a candy store, I can’t believe it!” Bonebreaker exclaimed, playing with all the different types of PVC piping as if they were Legos.  “There’s short ones, big ones, fat ones, skinny ones, old ones, new ones, some covered with foam, some not, I mean, this is beyond awesome.”  He let out a huge ecstatic scream.  “BEST!  CHRISTMAS!  EVER!”

Before orthopedic interns perform surgery on live patients, they need to become familiar with the use of drills and screws.  It is not uncommon for orthopedic interns in training programs to practice on materials that you would normally find at hardware stores.  Interns become acquainted with entry and exit points, drilling at different angles, and repairing fractured PVC piping.  Sometimes they’ll practice on wood blocks, other times they’ll practice on PVC pipes.

To the naked eye of someone who has tremendously poor vision, long bones and PVC piping are indistinguishable.

“We’ve spent a lot of time trying to drill holes into PVC piping while minimizing the distance we plunge through to the other side that is lined with foam,” said Bonebreaker, while playing with two PVC pipes like they were drumsticks.  “That’s why I when I sat on Santa’s lap this year I told him all I wanted was tons and tons of piping, so I can practice my technical skills.”

Though he didn’t ask this for Christmas, Santa has told Gomerblog that he got Bonebreaker “some pretty sweet drills” as well.

In other news, fellow orthopedic intern Riley Weakarms unfortunately made Santa’s Bad Orthopod list and was punished with a twenty-dollar Fisher-Price Drillin’ Action Tool Set.

  • Dr. 99

    First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.

  • Show Comments

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

comment *

  • name *

  • email *

  • website *

You May Also Like

Multidrug Resistant Superbug Susceptible Only to Brussel Sprouts

1.6KSharesKANSAS CITY, KS – Dr. Carlos Johnson was anxiously awaiting antibiotic susceptibility testing on ...

Orthopaedic Surgeons Declared Strongest Species on Earth

7KSharesGABORONE, BOTSWANA – Inspired by the 2018 World’s Strongest Man competition, local orthopaedic surgeon ...

weigh in weighs in

With a Scale Outside the Room, Hospitalist Asks Subspecialists to Weigh In

98SharesAUSTIN, TX – Several subspecialists at Brisket Medical Center have decided to weigh in ...


Preschool Teacher & Physician-Mom Have Differing Medical Opinions

1.9KSharesDr. Linda Richman received the dreaded phone call from her 4 year-old daughter’s preschool ...

Surgeon in Corner Running the Da Vinci is Actually Just Playing Video Games

466SharesCOLUMBUS, OH – A revelation concerning the function of the da Vinci robot console ...

motion artifact

Radiologist Blames Crumbling Marriage on Motion Artifact

326SharesATLANTA, GA – Radiology attending Xavier Robinson has thought about it long and hard.  ...