Struggling Hospital Converts Idle Operating Rooms Into Escape Rooms on Weekend

  • 2.5K
    Shares

SPRINGFIELD, NJ—One of the most popular new forms of entertainment may be coming to a hospital near you. In an effort to make more money, struggling hospitals are converting their idle operating rooms into escape rooms on the weekend.

“It makes perfect sense,” said an excited Richard Branchman, CEO of Springfield General Hospital. “We recognized that on weekends, there are hardly any surgeries taking place so most of the ORs sit empty. Why not use them to make some much needed dough?”

Charlotte Russo, a Springfield citizen, recently tried out the hospital-based escape room. “It was so exciting. They locked my friends and I in the OR, and we just went crazy in there, tossing everything around, running our sweaty hands over everything and breaking things as we tried to find clues on how to escape.”

Naturally, the theme of the escape room is a hospital operating room. They even present a cadaver on the operating table and game participants are instructed to dissect the body using scalpels and other surgical tools. Important clues are hidden within the cadaver. “After drilling through the skull, I found a puzzle clue attached to the cerebrum,” said Ms. Russo. “It was a real brainteaser!”

Another clue is hidden within the locked medicine cabinets and game players must crack the code to get into the cabinets and retrieve the clue. Ms. Russo explained that “we just had no idea what the code was to unlock the cabinets. So my friend took one of the OR computer monitors and launched it at the cabinet, shattering the glass door. My leg got cut real bad and blood splattered everywhere, but at least we got the clue!”

Despite thoroughly enjoying the experience, Charlotte’s group was unable to escape within the allotted time. “Oh man, it was so stressful towards the end. I threw up all over the room out of anxiety. It also didn’t help that my friend had the flu and couldn’t think straight through her sneezing attacks and hacking coughs. But we just can’t wait to try it again next weekend.”

In an unrelated story, a recent internal hospital study revealed an alarming increase in post-op infections and deaths, which have led to numerous lawsuits against Springfield General. To help pay for the lawsuits, hospital executives plan to expand the Escape Room games into patient rooms (can you escape before catching c diff?), and autopsies of the deceased surgical patients will now be incorporated into the game and performed by the contestants.

image_pdfimage_print
  • Proton Pimp

    Adorned in a stylish white fur coat, ravishing purple silk suit and a dozen gold necklaces, I spend my nights lounging in luxury and delivering beautiful bursts of acidic commentary about those in the medical field who deserve it—which, let’s face it, is pretty much everybody. Some may be offended, but I simply can’t be stopped; that is, except by my mortal nemesis: the dreaded Proton Pimp Inhibitor. Until recently, that little purple shill very effectively blocked the release of my most acidic work. But no longer! In addition to my lavish lifestyle, I also enjoy reading romance novels, listening to hit songs by Toto on loop, and staring at my Betty White pin-up calendar.

  • Show Comments

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

comment *

  • name *

  • email *

  • website *

You May Also Like

Miley Cyrus Undergoing Evaluation for Myoclonic Twerks

665SharesROCHESTER, MN – American singer and actress Miley Cyrus has told Gomerblog that she ...

Hospital with Low Survivability Submits Plans for New Employee Draft

43SharesDELAWARE – Recent published reports state morbidity and mortality rates are absolutely atrocious for ...

NASA Recruits GI Doc to Probe Uranus in Search of Gas

1.4KSharesWASHINGTON, D.C. – NASA scientists recently announced plans to explore Uranus by 2030, and ...

woman with common cold

Woman with a Cold Thoroughly Fills Out ED Comment Card

7.5KSharesST. LOUIS, MO – Mandy Tremboll, a suburbanite fighter for justice with absolutely no situational ...

Report: Hospital CEO Was a Big Help in Clinic Today

3.1KSharesST. LOUIS, MO – Outpatient care sources are reporting that Sacred Heart Hospital CEO ...