Proton Pimp Proton Pimp

Adorned in a stylish white fur coat, ravishing purple silk suit and a dozen gold necklaces, I spend my nights lounging in luxury and delivering beautiful bursts of acidic commentary about those in the medical field who deserve it—which, let’s face it, is pretty much everybody. Some may be offended, but I simply can’t be stopped; that is, except by my mortal nemesis: the dreaded Proton Pimp Inhibitor. Until recently, that little purple shill very effectively blocked the release of my most acidic work. But no longer! In addition to my lavish lifestyle, I also enjoy reading romance novels, listening to hit songs by Toto on loop, and staring at my Betty White pin-up calendar. Follow him at @TheProtonP on Twitter!!
board certification

ABIM Sponsors New Game Show: Who Wants to be Certified a Million Years?

PHILADELPHIA, PA—Unable to develop a recertification exam that is satisfactory to all, the American ...

HDL Cholesterol Breaks Bad, Tired of Always Being the “Good” On

ALBUQUERQUE, NM—High-density lipoprotein (HDL) cholesterol, the so-called “good” cholesterol that helpfully clears away cholesterol ...

Nurse Ratched Unretires to Become Preschool Nurse

SALEM, OR—Nurse Ratched, the villainous nurse from One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest has ...

Michelin Guide Awards 3 Stars to Hospital Cafeteria

DETROIT, MI—The Michelin Guide, the prestigious restaurant ratings book, awarded 3 stars—its highest honor—to ...

Delta WiFi bicarb

Med Student Stumped When Pilot Asks, “Anyone On Board a Doctor?”

FLYOVER COUNTRY, USA—While flying cross-country from California to New York, Simon Garvey’s worst nightmare ...