Pregnant

Study Linking Tylenol Use During Pregnancy and ADHD Partially Funded by Motrin

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NEW YORK – The FDA is now issuing an urgent warning against the recently released study in JAMA Pediatrics linking Tylenol use during pregnancy to attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).  The study which was performed in Denmark, received funding from Dr. Alexis VanderVansmole, a 37% shareholder of Motrin manufacturer, Big Johnson.

PregnantInitial reports are indicating that Dr. VanderVansmole had set aside personal funds for the study and even participated in calling the mothers in the study to determine if they used Tylenol or not.  According to one witness who is coming forward, researchers would find children diagnosed with ADHD in the study and then persuade the mothers to report an increased use of Tylenol during pregnancy.

“Wow, this study is really shady if it is true and things could get ugly, “said Pediatrician Dr. Henry Wilkens.  “There has always been a Tylenol vs. Motrin war in medicine, but this is stooping to a new low.  Usually the two sides just exchange witty banter, but one side trying to link the other to ADHD, wow!”

“Well played,” said pharmaceutical stock analyst Jim Creamer in reference to the Motrin manufacturer.  “What better way to shift the tide from Tylenol to Motrin than to play the ADHD card.  Tylenol has been king of pregnancy related pain, but that just might change.”

“This move by Motrin is almost as genius as Jenny McCarthy’s idea to link vaccines to autism,” stated vaccination proponent Amanda Givens.  “Jenny did a fantastic job with propagating false information and I almost wonder if she will jump at this new opportunity.”

Attorneys are already preparing for the onslaught of litigation cases, with Rogers and Williams firm tweeting, “If you have a child diagnosed with ADHD and you used Tylenol during Pregnancy, call us $$$.”

The study is causing complete pandemonium in OB/GYN offices across the country.  At Manchester Women’s Health Clinic in Massachusetts, receptionist Tina Myers has been on the phone nonstop today.  “Hundreds of women have already called and have asked what to do.  It is crazy here.”

OB/GYN resident, Dr. William Tuffles is not looking forward to starting his clinic day and call shift.  “Why do articles like this one always come out when I am on call?  I’m going to be bombarded with questions and I have no clue what to tell people, especially now hearing that the study funding might be flawed.”

Even if the financial allegations regarding the study turn out to be completely false, the damage may already be done.  After the flawed autism vaccination studies were confirmed, anti-vaccine people did not change their views, and in fact some became even more vocal.

Multiple medical organizations are already calling for the recall of this study due to the apparent conflict of interest with Dr. VanderVansmole, who could not be reached for comment regarding these allegations.

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