donut hole ACA

Affordable Care Act to Close Donut Hole with Delicious Strawberry Filling

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WASHINGTON, DC – For years, the Medicare Part D coverage gap or “donut hole” had always left senior citizens with a less-than-sweet taste in their mouths.  There is good news on the horizon.  According to federal officials, the Affordable Care Act (ACA) plans to close the gap completely in 2020 with a delicious homemade strawberry filling.

donut hole ACA
“I want more delicious donut holes!!”

“Americans love donuts, but they hate that hole in the middle,” explains John Astro, a spokesperson for the Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services (CMS) in Washington, DC.  “People are very upset.  Instead of a donut hole, there could be more… like more doughnut or even a filling.”

“I’m okay with a donut hole only if it’s accompanied by doughnut holes,” said senior citizen Mary Shipley from Houston, Texas, while eating a piping-hot, glazed, sugary confection of goodness.  “Something like Munchkins, you know what I mean?”

Since 2010, the ACA has gradually closed the gap.  But senior citizens are quick to point out that though the gap is smaller, there’s still a hole in the middle.

“See it, see it?” asked Richard Voodoo, a senior citizen from Portland, Oregon, while pointing at the donut hole.  “I can stick my finger through it!”  Voodoo left abruptly as an addictive Maple Bacon Bar distracted him.

According to provisions of the ACA, the donut hole will completely close in 2020, leaving our elderly with a whole tasty doughnut to enjoy.  Both Democrats and Republicans support a yummy strawberry jelly filling.  But this could easily change with several election years in between and numerous candidates showing passion for custard.

Until 2020, each state does offer at least one plan to help provide partial or even full coverage of the donut hole.

The Doughnut Plant’s Tres Leches and Dough’s Blood Orange are the most sought-out and delectable plans in New York.  Sublime Donuts’ Orange Dream Star is a favorite among Atlanta natives.  Chicago’s Doughnut Vault has an incredible selection of fresh-baked plans, though they sell out well-before lunchtime.  South Carolina residents are wowed by the coverage options at Glazed Gourmet Donuts in Charleston, while New Orleans faithful turn to beignet-based plans at Cafe du Monde.

Other favorite coverage gap plan providers include: Round Rock Donuts (Round Rock, Texas), Randy’s Donuts (Los Angeles, California), Dynamo Donuts (San Francisco, California), Top Pot Doughnuts (Seattle, Washington), and Federal Donuts (Philadelphia, Pennsylvania).

As it stands, the Medicare Part D coverage gap issue is best summarized by Springfield resident and donut lover Homer Simpson: “Mmm… donuts.”

  • Show Comments

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    Woody Coker

    Krispy Kreme is keeping us Charlestonians obese and happy.

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    Traci Lohbeck

    I’m hungry now

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    Rocco Arcieri

    While the above looked to be good news,
    Numerous insurance companies and CMS have stated water is the only generic filling covered.
    Jelly is on a tiered system and custard requires a prior authorization.

  • Avatar
    Emily Irwin


  • Avatar
    David DeLeon
  • Avatar
    Suzanne Layman

    This is truly a Medicare nightmare

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