malingerer map

New Dora the Malingerer Series to Win Over Canceled Doc McStuffins Fans

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ORLANDO, FL – Children and health care practitioners worldwide are still reeling after the forced resignation of Doc McStuffins.  Though Disney’s spin-off Admin McBriefcase is set to debut soon, Nickelodeon has its sights set on winning over Disney fans with their new series Dora the Malingerer.

malingerer map“Kids do grow up fast,” said Nickelodeon executive Cutie McDoiley.  “Dora just had a tweenage makeover, yes.  But she’s grown up even more now and faces her most difficult quest to date: battling a serious drug addiction.”

Dora the Malingerer is less passionate about her quests, unless they involve crack, cocaine, heroin, or crystal meth.  She still carries her purple backpack, which is mostly filled with pipes, used needles, shrooms, and an emergency stash of weed.  Boots, her faithful talking monkey friend, has taken a liking to booze, and is often inebriated and inappropriate.  “This is the first time at Nickelodeon where we’ve had to bleep out curse words,” said McDoiley.

Dora the Malingerer still interacts with her viewers.  In the pilot, she asks: “We need to go see a primary care doctor.  Where do we go first: a primary care doctor’s office or the ER?  The ER, right!”  In another episode, she asks: “My EF is only 5%, so which path should I take: the one lined with DNR forms or the one lined with ventilators and defibrillators?”  Sometimes her questions are just uncomfortable for the viewer: “Can I stay with you just one night?  I need a place to sleep and eat.  Please?!”

Swiper, the talking masked fox that attempts to steal others’ possessions, is also back for more.  More Dilaudid.  He, too, has a serious drug addiction.

Dora the Explorer fans will love the songs on Dora the Malingerer, which are more thought provoking than ever.  Song topics include drug overdose, pseudoseizures, unprotected sex and its consequences, being manipulative, and leaving against medical advice.

The “We did it!” song at the end of each Dora the Explorer episode is missing in Dora the Malingerer.  It will be replaced by health care practitioners singing a reprise entitled, “You’re discharged!”

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  • Avatar
    Andrew Rabinovich

    Kapi Sivakumar

  • Avatar
    Jill Hall

    Louise Pachella

  • Avatar
    Peg Rrt Bennett

    Perfect:)

  • Avatar
    Mike Plötner

    Not funny

  • Avatar
    Rachael Ward

    Robert Boyes

  • Avatar
    Jason Johnson

    Kisha Crofts

  • Avatar
    Walker Lindley

    She is now a “gomera”

  • Avatar
    Demidova Olga

    Hope she comes back with lots of Senokot.

  • Avatar
    Jennifer Wooten

    Walker Lindley

  • Avatar
    Jeff Smith

    Only one place here that would hold my interest Deb..

  • Avatar
    Tammy Cameron Maher

    Discharged Dora yesterday.

  • Avatar
    Alex Josiah Dunn

    Love it.

  • Avatar
    Kelly Renee

    Erin Kathryn

  • Avatar
    Haley Johnson

    Becky Schroeder Alex Josiah Dunn wtf

  • Avatar
    ZDoggMD

    Swiper no Swiping…my oxycontin.

  • Avatar
    John Klaman

    This is the more of the high quality cartooning one expects as we mature.

  • Avatar
    Lauren Jarchin

    Dory Ben

  • Avatar
    Derek Seib

    *slow clap

  • Avatar
    Rachel Carty Moehlmann

    Meaghan Fleschner Barry gomerblog again. This is hysterical since I grew up with that annoying little twerp Dora

  • Avatar
    Debbie Sheffield

    Jeff Smith

  • Avatar
    Brooke Billingsley

    Sarah Claire Sandy Ford-Fernandez Lori Leonhardt

  • Avatar
    Katie Rose

    Arya Farahvashi

  • Avatar
    Adrian Miclea

    You’re my inspiration Gomerblog

  • Avatar
    Farah Nasraty

    Lily Gvi

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