medical student crying

OB/GYN Resident Skills Directly Linked to Number of Medical Students Made to Cry

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BOZEMAN, MT – A recent study using data gathered from women’s hospitals nationwide, recently confirmed a longtime hypothesis: OB/GYN residents who are the most adept at delivering babies, with the least morbidity and mortality rates, are also the best at making medical students cry.

medical student crying
“I didn’t know the new ACOG preeclampsia guidelines”

Study head, Dr. Barry Ono, elaborates on the reason behind the study: “We have always known medical students to run in fear from the halls of Labor & Delivery (L&D) with tears streaming down their faces, but this is the first time we have asked ourselves, ‘Is that really such a bad thing?'”

“It turns out the more displaced anger any given OB/GYN resident has towards his or her medical students, the less laboring patients feel their wrath, which in turn leads to better outcomes, as well as higher patient satisfaction.”

We interviewed Dr. Mary North, one of the top performing OB/GYN residents in her program’s history, for her perspective.  “When I was an intern and was pissed off about life, as I often am, I used to take it out on my difficult patients, you know by unnecessarily delaying epidurals, ramping up the Pitocin too fast, suggesting caesarians without clear indications, etc.”

“But then, a wise senior resident told me I should really try making med students feel inadequate instead.  As soon as I made my first student cry after I pimped the heck out of him, ridiculed him even when he got the answers right, and made him retract for hours during a vaginal hysterectomy on a 300-lb. woman, it just felt right.  Since then, after having been responsible for the tears of countless medical students, I am able to deliver 10-lb. breech births with my hands practically tied behind my back.  AND I’m chief resident!”

Dr. North’s average time from greeting a 3rd year medical student on rotation to reducing him or her into a blubbering short-coated mess is now approximately 1 minute and 36 seconds (top 1% nationwide across specialties).

Since the publication of the study, the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) has made efforts with OB/GYN programs nationwide to train residents to more efficiently pair any teachable moment for medical students with profuse lacrimation (from the student, of course).

The medical students who participated in the study were unable to be reached for comment, as they were either cowering in the L&D call rooms or too busy being yelled at during postpartum rounds.

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  • Avatar
    Adrian Miclea

    Soul vampires

  • Avatar
    Brett Walters

    6 weeks of eternal hell.

  • Avatar
    Justin Hamlin

    What?!?! More like general surgery!

  • Avatar
    June J. Ko

    yeah they made me cry

  • Avatar
    Glenda Johnson

    Happens every time

  • Avatar
    Emily Mills

    I never fully understood this phenomenon until about a year ago..

  • Avatar
    Emily Mills

    I never fully understood this phenomenon until about a year ago..

  • Avatar
    Nora Glasspool

    Too true. I think thus applies to the L&D nurses’ treatment of Family Practice residents.

  • Avatar
    ZDoggMD

    OB/Gyn was the reason I am now a third-rate medical rap parody artist. PTSD, son.

  • Avatar
    Samer Riaz

    Janaki Nandam

  • Avatar
    Bob Benjy

    Am I supposed to be impressed by this nonsense?

  • Avatar
    Nathan Brachiosaurus-Ackerman

    Glad I’m contributing so much to patient care

  • Avatar
    Monica Sood

    I was the friendly nice one who was too chatty to be home on time as a resident remember? Never made anyone cry ;)

  • Avatar
    Lo Ann

    Haha can you confirm this Emily Mills?

  • Avatar
    Pragnesh Patel

    Monica Sood. Check this out

  • Avatar
    Juana LaCubana

    Lol. Rebecca Anne, Erin Watson.

  • Avatar
    Michael Reid

    Never met a more miserable group of people. Gyn/onc was worst two weeks of my life. The sunshine world of surgery, hours and hours of “steering the uterus” (never correctly)…while the fellow constantly says “we’re interacting” to try to hide her incompetence at laparoscopy/Da Vinci. Combine that with the always chipper OB residents…and there you go.

  • Avatar
    Brian Jeb

    Yep. Can’t argue with a single word of that

  • Avatar
    Jeannie Gilman

    If nurses’ tears improved patient care, there would be no need for articles or satire like this…

  • Avatar
    Aleisha Gorski

    Now that exams are over, attention can be diverted elsewhere Kate Mitchell Milli Ryan Emily Twidale…..harsh!

  • Avatar
    Aliye Lauren

    Not me!! And not my program :)

  • Avatar
    Drew Giaconi

    Omg. The residents on mine SUUUUUUUUCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKEEEEEEDDD. They were like a coven of vile devil witches.

  • Avatar
    Chivon Jackson

    This is awful :(

  • Avatar
    Garvey René

    LOL!!!

  • Avatar
    Erica Lisa

    Judith Anesi

  • Avatar
    Rekha Pawar

    Lolol

  • Avatar
    Carrie Michelle Gould

    Yep

  • Avatar
    Greg Emmanuel

    Julie Westberg

  • Avatar
    Guy Connell

    LOL

  • Avatar
    Matthew Hahn

    Ya!!! What is it about OB/Gyn residents? They were the worst and meanest!

  • Avatar
    Phil Prentice

    Heather Jereb

  • Avatar
    Anna Gay

    OMG. The headline sums up my clerkship perfectly

  • Avatar
    Anna Gay

    OMG. The headline sums up my clerkship perfectly

  • Avatar
    Bill Moore

    That’s more true than satire! :-o

  • Avatar
    Bill Moore

    That’s more true than satire! :-o

  • Avatar
    Kristy Hoffman Blum

    Hilarious!!!

  • Avatar
    Kristy Hoffman Blum

    Hilarious!!!

  • Avatar
    Derek Ewell

    I didn’t tag either of you in accusation. I just laughed.

  • Avatar
    Derek Ewell

    I didn’t tag either of you in accusation. I just laughed.

  • Avatar
    Tara Pavelek

    Bimal Patel

  • Avatar
    Rebecca Skelton Mateiro

    Hahahahaha

  • Avatar
    Gita Subramanian Pensa

    So funny. My OB/Gyn residents when I was a med student were the absolute meanest. I probably made their skills impeccable.

  • Avatar
    Charla Tully

    Kati Dengler I suspect this is reality. ;)

  • Avatar
    Joo Lee
  • Avatar
    Demidova Olga

    No its Plastic Surgery Fellows who make people cry, especially once who feel incompetent inside. OBGYNs were awesome people. I chose not to match Anesthesiology after my WONDERFUL Plastics rotation. :)

  • Avatar
    Talila Lobel

    LOL! :)

  • Avatar
    Jeff Siegler

    Michael Mitri, Kimberlyn Detrick Laura Spector Nicole Waschak

  • Avatar
    Kevin Nasky

    Jessica Volsky

  • Avatar
    Ashley Ford

    Me either. I did my fair share of crying though as one!

  • Avatar
    Scott Krugman

    Love it.

  • Avatar
    Jilly Bean

    I don’t cry…I make people cry.

  • Avatar
    Ashley Shelley

    I’m usually the one crying, not the students!! You are a hot mess.

  • Avatar
    Derek Ewell

    Jilly Bean Ashley Shelley.

  • Avatar
    Derek Ewell

    Jilly Bean Ashley Shelley.

  • Avatar
    Julie Wiley

    Too funny! I honestly don’t think I ever made any medical student cry…

  • Avatar
    Julie Wiley

    Too funny! I honestly don’t think I ever made any medical student cry…

  • Avatar
    Julie Wiley

    “It just felt right!”

  • Avatar
    Julie Wiley

    “It just felt right!”

  • Avatar
    Elizabeth Marin Hernandez

    Jessica Rose this made me laugh. Thought of you

  • Avatar
    Elizabeth Marin Hernandez

    Jessica Rose this made me laugh. Thought of you

  • Avatar
    Ashley Ford

    Hahaha Julie Wiley

  • Avatar
    Ashley Ford

    Hahaha Julie Wiley

  • Avatar
    Hanna K

    Lol that’s awesome

  • Avatar
    Hanna K

    Lol that’s awesome

  • Avatar
    Eric Norman

    Sounds about right.

  • Avatar
    Eric Norman

    Sounds about right.

  • Avatar
    Kayla McGrath-Erguigue

    Aliye Lauren Monica Monica

  • Avatar
    Kayla McGrath-Erguigue

    Aliye Lauren Monica Monica

  • Avatar
    Colleen Begley

    hey now!

  • Avatar
    Colleen Begley

    hey now!

  • Avatar
    Jonna Zarbano

    Carley Hennessy

  • Avatar
    Jonna Zarbano

    Carley Hennessy

  • Avatar
    Azra K

    Erum Azhar

  • Avatar
    Azra K

    Erum Azhar

  • Avatar
    Farah Nasraty

    Amanda Miller

  • Avatar
    Farah Nasraty

    Amanda Miller

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