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couple kissing

We recently published a Worst Pickup Line by Medical Specialty article and the responses we received from fans were absolutely hilarious.  Here are your contributions!  Thank you guys so much for the laughs and if you have any more, let us know!  Who knows, we might update this list some more with YOUR horrendous pick-up line!

Anesthesiology
“I’ll give you an experience you won’t remember.” – RTA
“You won’t feel a thing… Oh wait…” – CYY

Cardiology & Electrophysiology
“I’ll make your heart skip a beat.” – KHR

ENT
“If my nose ran with money, honey, I’d blow it all on you” – BH

Family Medicine
“I’m not sure which move will work. But you’ll be satisfied.” – KN
“Baby let’s do a little bit of everything” – JH

Gastroenterology
“Girl, are you my appendix? Because I don’t know about you, but you give me a funny feeling in my gut that makes me want to take you out.” – KS

Geneticist
“Let’s improve our gene pool!” – HG

Health Care Providers
“Total time spent: 35 minutes.” – MS

Infectious Diseases
“Let’s contaminate each other’s cultures.” – FM

Nursing
“Let me take off your gown and give you a wipe down.” – FT

Nursing – Emergency
“I can help you learn to pronounce that word that starts with a D.” – RR
“Let’s talk about SUX, baby, let’s talk about you and me, let’s talk about SUX!” – RW

Nursing – ICU
“I’d like to sedate you and see where it goes from there…” – JH
“Let’s get you tied down and start with triple penetration.” – RW
“If you have a hole, we’re going to put something in it!” – FT

OB/GYN
“It’s okay, I do this professionally.” – GA

Orthopedic Surgery
“Do you mind if the Stryker rep watches?” – MH

Pathology
“I like to do it with dead people.” – KHR
“Is that your rigor mortis or are you just happy to see me?” – BP

Respiratory Therapy
“The harder you breathe, the faster we come!” – WG

Radiation Oncology
“No meat, no treat”
“Hard Beam+Tight Collimation=Adequate Penetration”
“Let’s do some X-ray-ted activities”  – TD

Speech Therapy
“I’m here for your swallow evaluation.” – KJO

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Dr. 99
First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.
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