bunk bed

Family Admits That Putting Grandma in the Top Bunk was Probably a Bad Idea

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BROOKLYN, NY – After thinking back on the events that had transpired over the past week, the family of 98-year-old Bertha Schwartz, who presented to Maimonides Medical Center with a left femoral neck fracture after a fall, finally admits that putting their grandma in the top bunk was a probably not a good idea after all.

bunk bed top bunk
“Should given Grandma the lower bunk after all”

“We admit, our preference was to have Grandma in the bottom bunk but it became really hard to change her mind once she screamed out, ‘Dibs!’” explained grandson David Schwartz, his face filled with regret.  She can be very stubborn in her old age.”

“Unfortunately, the small mistakes kept adding up,” explained David’s wife, Marisa.  “First with that, then with our decision not to fix the wooden steps she had to climb to even get to the top bunk.”  She shook her head.  “I thought the she and the ladder were equally frail – she does use a rolling walker after all – that they would sort of balance each other out.”

She lost her balance instead, the rest is history.

Thankfully, Grandma Schwartz successfully underwent repair of her fractured hip without complication.  She is currently going through the obligatory bout of hyperactive delirium before being discharged to subacute rehab for planned acquisition of a UTI (urinary tract infection).

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    First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.

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