Resident Weighing the Risks & Benefits of Weighing the Risks & Benefits

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NEW YORK, NY – Medical personnel at NYU Langone Medical Center are holding their breath as they witness second-year resident Arielle Abraham weighing the risks & benefits of weighing the risks & benefits of starting anticoagulation in a 64-year-old female with new-onset atrial fibrillation.

risks & benefits

“If I talk to the patient about the risks & benefits of anticoagulation, it’ll be an informed decision and it’ll truly be a team effort since there’s surely a lot to talk about: stroke risk, let alone what to use: aspirin or Coumadin or any of the other new blood thinners or no blood thinners at all,” Abraham said aloud, pacing around the nurses station.  “But the patient is a little confused right now, probably with a UTI, so it might be worth getting the family involved and that’ll take some effort.”

“If I don’t weigh the risks & benefits and just pick one, it’ll sure save a lot of time, not just for me, but for all of us,” Abraham countered.

Abraham furrowed her brow before pulling up a seat, folding her hands together and resting her chin on top, thinking and thinking.  The tension on the floor was palpable.  Everyone waited.

And waited.

Ten minutes later, Abraham arose from her seat with a look of triumph.

“I have weighed the risks and benefits and have decided in favor of weighing the risks and benefits with my patient!” she exclaimed before running to her patient’s room to have said discussion.

It is unclear why Abraham has been thinking out loud this whole time, but it sure provided excellent entertainment for everyone on the floor.

“It’s always fun to hear residents talk aloud, get some insight into their thought processes,” explained charge nurse Maria Ozols, happy to take a break from her mandatory 10 hours of charting.  “What did I learn?  I learned she’s cray cray.”

  • Dr. 99

    First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.

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