NEW HAVEN, CT – A patient and her inpatient medicine team at Yale Medical Center are relieved to report that her nasopharyngeal swab for Covid-19 has come back positive, negative & indeterminate. This marks a huge diagnostic win for healthcare professionals who are now six months into the pandemic.

“Just think about it, six months ago we didn’t have any tests or if we did the turnaround time took anywhere from 5 to 7 days,” explained Yale hospitalist Dr. Trevor Monahan. “But fast forward to today. It took only 12 hours to get this test result back. It really is a game-changer.”

“I’m relieved to say the least,” explained patient 37-year-old Alexandra Chin, who wished to remain nameless. She has been improving every day and says her team is thinking about discharging her home in the next 24 to 48 hours. “I was really worried that I came down with coronavirus. Thank goodness that swab helped clear things up.”

Dr. 99
First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.