The Food & Drug Administration (FDA) first granted Emergency Use Authorization to the Pfizer-BioNTech COVID-19 vaccine earlier this month, with Moderna’s COVID-19 vaccine shortly gaining the same authorization very shortly thereafter. There have been many questions asking how these two vaccines stack up against one another, but a huge question remains largely unanswered: how do they both stack up against the Invincibility Stars or Starmen from Super Mario Bros.?
TARGET POPULATION: Not medical students. An Invincibility Star is reserved only for Mario, maybe Luigi.
EFFICACY: The Pfizer and Modern COVID-19 vaccine were >90% effective at preventing symptomatic COVID-19, the former 7 days after the second dose and the latter 14 days after the second dose. An Invincibility Star is immediately effective at preventing not only symptomatic COVID-19 but also any attacks by Bowser’s henchmen.
DURATION OF PROTECTION: Unclear, but the hope is both Pfizer & Moderna vaccines will convey protection on the order of several months. Sadly, Invincibility Star convey protection only for a few seconds.
BACKGROUND MUSIC: The Invincibility Star is accompanied with a musical theme. The COVID-19 vaccines do not come with a musical theme, something which has drawn the ire of healthcare personnel and gamers alike.
SIDE EFFECTS: The most common side effects from the COVID-19 vaccines are pain at the injection site, headache, muscle pain, fatigue, hope, relief, and optimism. The most common side effect of the Invincibility Star is post-Invincibility Star depression.
PREGNANT OR LACTATING WOMEN: The Covid-19 vaccines or Invincibility Stars have not been studied in pregnant or lactating women.
STORAGE: The Pfizer vaccine must be kept at -94 Fahrenheit and used within 5 days of thawing. The Moderna vaccine must be kept at -4 Fahrenheit, and can be stored in the refrigerator for 30 days or room temperature for 12 hours. Starmen must be used before it exits the screen.
PURCHASE: Both the Pfizer and Moderna vaccines can be purchased from the companies directly; a minimum order of 100 and 975 doses, respectively. An Invincibility Star cannot be purchased; it must be found through sheer determination and luck after breaking lots and lots of bricks.
