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Vanilla Ice Keeps Ringing Call Light for “Ice Ice Baby”

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MIAMI, FL – All right stop!  Collaborate and listen: Gomerblog reports that patient Vanilla Ice is bugging the hell out of nursing staff at Miami Medical Center (MMC), pressing the call light no less than 100 times in the past 3 hours in order to request some “ice ice baby.”  He was admitted with hyperthermia.

“Will it ever stop?” asked his nurse Marci Hammer.  “I said to him, ‘Mr. Ice, I’ve brought you so much ice already, how much more do you need?  The ice is just melting, making a mess.  Someone could slip and hit their head.’  I also told him to stop calling me ‘baby.'”

Seconds later, Vanilla Ice once again pressed the call light.

”Is there a problem?” Nurse Hammer asked with an irritated tone, to which Vanilla Ice responded, “If there was a problem, yo I’ll solve it!  Check out the hook while my DJ resolves it.  Ice ice baby!”

“I have no idea what the hell you’re talking about, but I’m definitely not bringing you more ice,” Hammer responded.  There was a pregnant pause before Vanilla Ice answered back.  “Yo man, let’s get out of here.”  He added later: “Word to your mother.”

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    First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.

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