WASHINGTON, D.C. – Though details behind the White House’s decision are still lacking, Gomerblog has learned current United States Surgeon General Jerome Adams has been demoted to Surgeon Colonel.  This marks the first time in American history a U.S. Surgeon General has dropped in rank.

Military experts say this is a serious announcement, considering he was technically demoted two ranks: Surgeon Lieutenant General is the rank immediately below Surgeon General while Surgeon Colonel is the rank immediately below Surgeon Lieutenant General.

“I’ve got to think Adams made some sort of major offense, like not getting his notes or discharge summaries done on time,” said CNN senior legal analyst Jeffrey Toobin.  “You’ve got to get those discharge summaries done on time, that’s just the way it is.”

Dr. Vivek Murthy, who was the last U.S. Surgeon General before Adams, did admit that rounding on 300 million Americans and then documenting those encounters everyday was quite taxing.

Dr. 99
First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.