Wednesday, June 16, 2021

Emergency Medicine

These Two Dudes Caught, Reign of Terror Over

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ST. LOUIS, MO – America’s most popular unsolved mystery, the mystery case of two individuals who team up to shoot, beat, and steal from many innocent Americans, has been solved.  These two criminals only known...

Friday Afternoon Clinic Patient Surprisingly Sent to the Emergency Department

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA – The emergency department at Queen’s Hospital had a very rare event occur this Friday afternoon.  74-year-old Wilma Gooding, checked into the emergency room around 4:12 p.m. with a chief complaint of “needing...
trauma knife

Trauma Patient with Isolated Stab Wound to Shoulder Can’t Understand Why His $300 Pants...

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WASHINGTON, DC - A trauma patient at Washington Hospital Center became visibly upset in the trauma bay after his $300 pants were cut off with trauma shears.  25-year-old Julius Matterson was in an altercation with his girlfriend at his...

Pseudoseizure: Please Practice Before Coming to the ED

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MILWAUKEE, WI - Emergency department staff at Elm Grove Methodist Medical Center thoroughly enjoyed the complete nonsensical seizure performance by a local homemaker. Carol Whitaker, 43, of Wauwatosa presented to the Emergency Department yesterday with what she...