Breaking: Patient is a Rich Historian, Perhaps the Best Historian Ever
PORTLAND, OR - In what is certainly a breath of fresh air, an ER physician was pleasantly surprised to discover that her patient wasn't...
Mob Boss Agrees to Shoot Man in Kneecaps Before Weekend
CHICAGO, IL - "I swore off horse races for 10 years, but I relapsed," Sam Hemsworth told us from his wheelchair. "Before I knew...
ACEP Renames Black Friday ‘Black & Blue Friday’
IRVING, TX - Recognizing Black Friday not as the first day of the holiday shopping season but as a day to "kill each other...
EMS Company Offers Subscription-Based Service
INDIANAPOLIS, IN - Accessible Ambulance, a local EMS company, will soon roll out a new way to provide care for the greater Indianapolis community...
ER Nurses Delighted Not to Have Breaks, According to Managers
SAN JOSE, CA - Chronically overworked ER nurses have complained for months about being overworked. Finally, after months of meetings and discussions new policies...
Man vs. Koala: A List of Lesser Known ER Complaints
Usually “versus” suggests a terrible trauma coming through the ER, such as Man vs. Car, something that we never want to see. But then...
Elephant Complains of Chest Pain ‘Like a Human Sitting on My Chest’
NEW YORK, NY - At approximately 6:00 AM this morning, a local elephant named Eli the Elephant developed excruciating ten out of ten chest...
Patients Love New Turkey Sandwich with Dilaudid & Benadryl: The Turlaudidryl Special
NEW ORLEANS, LA - In a brilliant new campaign to improve patient satisfaction scores at the expense of appropriate medical care, hospital administrators and...
New Pain Medication Vending Machine is Sure to Be a Hit
HAPPY VALLEY, CA - Administrators at Happy Valley Emergency Department are working together with a major soda manufacturer to replicate a pain medication ordering...
Charting is Independent Risk Factor for DVT and PE, Study Finds
ROCHESTER, MN - Recognizing it is a form of immobilization in which health care professionals are unable to move around much, a study newly published...