This Patient Really Belongs on Your Service
Commentary by a Doctor of a Kind Different From Your Kind
Hi. I’m really sorry to be waking you at an hour such as this...
Headlines from the Week in Medical News
ROCHESTER, NY - After two-year grant-writing process, associate professor of medicine’s submission to JAMA’s “funny cartoon caption contest” fails peer review process.
AKRON, OH -...
NC Hospital Offers Discounted Craniotomy with ATV Purchase
WINSTON-SALEM, NC - With hunting season fast approaching, a North Carolina hospital has made a controversial move: they have partnered with an ATV dealership...
Medical Specialties as Disney Characters
Anesthesia - Rafiki from The Lion King. Most of the rest of us have no clue what the hell you are doing with all...
Medical Specialties as Harry Potter Characters
Dolores Umbridge, Corenelius Fudge, Percy Weasley- Administration- you operate on a sliding scale of likability and we aren’t sure if you’re evil, rigid, or...
Music Review: Radiohead’s Clinic A
Rating: 4.5 out of 5 QRS Complexes
The opening track is called “Everything is AV-Paced.” It is an adventure in arrhythmia, with drummer Phil Selway...
Black Cloud Begs On-Call Meteorologist for Help
NEW HAVEN, CT - Finding herself underdressed & underprepared for this torrential downpour of admissions and cross-cover calls, third-year medicine resident and self-diagnosed black...
Bow Tie-Wearing ER Intern Immediately Ostracized by Peers
GREENVILLE, SC - An ER intern, Calvin McSpiffy, who showed up to work in a bow tie, has been immediately ostracized by his peers...
Crayola Releases New Colors of Emergency Codes
EASTON, PA - In an effort to overhaul and better standardize emergency codes and make “Everything Imaginable” for health care providers, Crayola has announced...
Breaking: CPR Requires Prior Authorization
WASHINGTON, D.C. - In breaking news that will infinitely complicate the already difficult process of attempting to resuscitate a patient, cardiopulmonary resuscitation (or CPR)...