Hypodilaudemia Epidemic Reaches Painful Proportions
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The United States Department of Health and Human Services reports this morning that there has been a recent spike nationwide in...
Health Department Gives Parrots To Patients Who Need Reminding
MADISON, WI — The Dane County Department of Public Health has issued free parrots to 250 of the most frequently hospitalized patients in Madison....
Patient Admitted with Life-Threatening Butthurt Exacerbation
CHICAGO, IL - "Move people, this guy's crashing!" EMTs yelled, asking everyone to get out of their way as they aggressively carried 33-year-old Alexander...
Twitter Unveils New Electronic Medical Record, Tweet-MR
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - Twitter announced today that it would enter the business of electronic medical records, or EMRs. Twitter CEO and founder Jack...
Patient Awarded for Most ER Visits in 2015
JACHO, TX - Mr. Jeremy Grimes entered Memorial Hospital ER in the waning hours of New Years Eve like he had done 93 times...
Physician Foreplay 101: How to Seduce Your Doctor
Seduce any doctor by using valuable information about his or her specialty to ensure total success in the bedroom.
Emergency Medicine
Go skydiving to get the...
How Many Different Hats Can a Medical Provider Wear?
It's not uncommon in modern medicine for any given health care provider, whether it's a nurse, PA, or doctor, to have multiple roles or...
Retiring Soccer Star to Open Malingering Clinic for ED Drug Seekers
MUNICH, GERMANY - In a surprise announcement sure to shock both the soccer and medical world, German star midfielder, Michael Schmerzen, announced today his...
Crayola Releases New Colors of Emergency Codes
EASTON, PA - In an effort to overhaul and better standardize emergency codes and make “Everything Imaginable” for health care providers, Crayola has announced...
Doctors, Nurses in Disbelief as Even Infants Are Drug-Seeking
ATLANTA, GA - Well, folks, now we’ve seen it all. GomerBlog is sad to break the unfortunate news that the world is descending into...