Emergency Medicine

55-hour ENERGY

FDA Approves 55-Hour ENERGY for Incoming July Interns

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WASHINGTON, DC - In a major win for soon-to-be-exhausted incoming July interns at residency programs across the land, the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) has...
north korea hackers

North Korea Hacks ER Pyxis Machines Nationwide, Renders Them Unable to Dispense Dilaudid

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WASHINGTON, DC - The White House has announced that North Korea has successfully hacked yet another electronic staple of American life – the drug-dispensing Pyxis...
emergency department

New KwikChek ED Expected to be a Hit

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BALTIMORE, MD - A revolutionary new emergency department will be tested soon in the Second Memorial Semi-Regional Healthcare Center and Annexes.  "We took functional...
emergency physician

7 Phrases That Make an Emergency Medicine Resident Want to End It All

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1) So what specialty are you going into after residency? Emergency medicine.  How do you not get this?  That’s why I’m here seeing you in...
father's day for physician or nurse

Last Minute Father’s Day Gifts for Your Physician/Nurse Dad

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Did you forget to buy your doctor or nurse dad a gift for Father’s Day?  Don’t worry, GomerBlog has you covered.  Here’s a last...
Helps Makes Life Clearer

Doctor Actually Thinks He Is Saving Lives

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WORCESTER, MA - Dr. Danny Trenda, a recent Tufts University Medical School graduate, told friends at Tony’s Tavern that he was saving lives.  His friends,...
hospital emergency room boarding

ER Doc Sent to Penalty Box, Gets 5 Minutes for Boarding

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BIRMINGHAM, AL - Just when things in the emergency room (ER) couldn't get any worse with influenza A in full swing, all 435 beds...

Nurse O.J. Simpson Can’t Ever Get a Glove to Fit

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BRENTWOOD, CA - Geez, O.J. Simpson just can't get a break!  He has been asked over and over again to go into a patient's...
nursing home

Bed-Bound, Demented 89-Year-Old Successfully Resuscitated, Discharged to Wallow in Own Excrement at Nursing Home

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GREENSBORO, NC - A team of physicians, nurses, and support staff is being lauded for its efforts in saving the life of Jasper Billings,...
recto-retriever

Recto-Retriever Approved for Personal Use

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COLUMBIA, SC - Proctologic Inc. announces the release of its new product, the Recto-Retriever.  The Recto-Retriever is an amazing, thrilling, and versatile tool that...