Emergency Medicine

turkey in code cart

Breaking: Study Finds Efficacy of Turkey Sandwiches in Convincing ED patients to Discharge AMA...

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In what is being called a major wake-up call for the Emergency Medicine community, a groundbreaking study published in The Washington Journal of Emergency...

‘I’m Never Going to Drink Again’ Uttered by 40 Million Americans New Year’s Morning

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - The FDA estimates that over 40 million Americans will utter the phrase “I’m never going to drink again” on New Year’s...
avocado toast

It’s All Good: Avocado Toast More Effective Than Steroids in the Treatment of Septic...

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NEW YORK, NY - The most important publication since the release of the Sepsis-3 guidelines, a multi-center trial led by a team of physicians...
malingerer map

New Dora the Malingerer Series to Win Over Canceled Doc McStuffins Fans

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ORLANDO, FL - Children and health care practitioners worldwide are still reeling after the forced resignation of Doc McStuffins.  Though Disney’s spin-off Admin McBriefcase...
phone

Health Care Providers Hail the Launch of the New “Patient Complaint Line”

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Following in the pattern of patient satisfaction scores, Dreamland General Hospital has initiated a new "Patient Complaint Line."  When a patient has acted in...
emergency department

Intern Shocked to Discover TV Residency and Real Residency Vastly Different

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BALTIMORE, MD - Dr. Anita Campbell dreamt of becoming a physician for years.  Three months ago, she finally graduated from medical school to fulfill...
sick patient

Emergency Medicine Attending Fails to Admit Old Man, Resigns

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BLOOMINGTON, IN - Emergency medicine attending, Dr. Howard Rugers, announced his retirement yesterday after failing to find reason for admission for 95-year-old Herschel Levenstein,...

Ashley Madison Data Leak Possibly Linked to Spike in Hospital Admissions

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LOS ANGELES, CA - News of the Ashley Madison adultery website data leak is possibly leading to an unexpected surge in hospital resource utilization today,...
bicarb-only sodium bicarbonate

ICU Team Figures Out What Their Code Needs: More Bicarb!

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - The ICU team at New Orleans Medical Center (NOMC) made history today by becoming the first medical team ever to implement a bicarb-only...

To Capture More Cardiology Viewers, Jake Tapper Renames Show to “The 12-Lead”

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ATLANTA, GA - In an attempt to attract a higher percentage of the much-desired cardiology demographic, producers and the host of "The Lead" Jake Tapper have...