Maroon 5 Admitted to Hospital with 5 Maroon Stools
LOS ANGELES, CA - Maroon 5 is hospitalized at UCLA Medical Center after collectively experiencing 5 maroon-colored stools, including lead singer and NBC’s The...
Off-Service Intern Writes Pulitzer Prize Winning Provider Note While EM Resident Sees Thirty Patients
“I just want to get the voice right,” said brand-new internal medicine resident Dr. Joseph Green. “Like, I want to paint a picture of...
Health Care Providers Unsure What That Bright Yellow Glowing Orb is in the Sky
CHARLESTON, SC - In an eye-opening new study published in the latest issue of JAMA (Just Another Medical Association), researchers at The Medical University...
Hospital Administrators Consider Renaming MDs to “Morphine & Dilaudid”
TAMPA, FL - Following the immense success of renaming registered nurses (RNs) to “Refreshments & Narcotics,” hospital administrators at Tampa Memorial Cross Hospital (TMCH)...
Industrious Homeless Man Creates Hospital Room-Share Website
BALTIMORE CITY, MD - Jerome Stanton an opportunist and venerate street man of Baltimore City has created an online marketplace for patrons to share...
Breaking: CPR Requires Prior Authorization
WASHINGTON, D.C. - In breaking news that will infinitely complicate the already difficult process of attempting to resuscitate a patient, cardiopulmonary resuscitation (or CPR)...
Man in US Furious About Waiting 15 minutes in ER; Meanwhile Patient in South...
DENVER, CO – 46-year-old Marcus Stillbee is furious after waiting for 15 minutes to be seen at the local Quicky Care Medical Center ER...
Nurses, Doctors Fight Back with New Health Care Practitioner Satisfaction Surveys
NEW YORK, NY - Sick and tired of the unfair nature of patient satisfaction surveys that puts service above disease management, a multidisciplinary team...
Lost Your Car in the Hospital Garage? Order a Consult
If it has happened once, it has happened a million times: you forgot where you parked. It is the end of the day and...
What ‘Thank You for the Interesting Consult’ Really Means, Part 1
Initial consult notes usually end with the following line: Thank you for the interesting consult. What does that really mean? In the first of...