Emergency Medicine

Psychiatrist Joins WWE and Puts Opponent in a Mental Health Hold

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LUBBOCK, TX – Finally fed up with all the bullying he was receiving from general surgeons, Dr. Froyd abandoned his post as Consultation-Liaison Psychiatrist...

SHITSTORM Red Flag Phrases During Patient Turnover

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DJIBOUTI, DJIBOUTI - The 5th annual Seminar of Hospital Internists Technologists Surgeons Traumatologists Others RNs and More (SHITSTORM) convention resulted in the drafting of...
fart, CNN, Anderson Cooper

Breaking News: Fart of the Century Kills 50

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ATLANTA, GA - In unsettling news from Atlanta University Hospital today, patient Timothy Flatus unleashed a fart at 9:45 PM last night so powerful...
sh*tty consult

A Practical Guide to Intravenous Line Insertion for Interns by a Cynical Resident Post...

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1. Decide if you really need the line. You can use this simple test. Approach your senior doctor and say, “The patient has really...
screaming in ED

ED Study Links Volume of Screaming to Patient’s Level of Pain

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SAN ANTONIO, TX - In a landmark study published in this month's Annals of Emergency Medicine, researchers from an emergency department in Sarasota, Florida have found evidence...
slaps monitor v-fib

Medicine Resident Slaps Monitor Hoping V-Fib is Just Artifact

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ATLANTA, GA - Implementing an often overlooked early step in the ACLS algorithm, third-year Emory University internal medicine resident Carrie-Ann Winslow slapped the monitor at the patient's...
letter d

FDA Bans Any Narcotic with the Letter ‘D’ In It

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ATLANTA, GA - The Food & Drug Administration (FDA) finally came to its senses today by agreeing to ban any narcotic that contains the...

Guy on Motorcycle Looking Forward to Donating His Organs

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CALIFORNIA – Harris Jasper, a 3-year rider of a Kawasaki Ninja, or crotch rocket, told friends and family that this year would likely be the year...

ER Refuses to End Hospital Shutdown Until IM Agrees to Admit All Drunks

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NEW ORLEANS, LA – Tulane Medical Center has shut down the hospital after negotiations between the Emergency Room (ER) and Internal Medicine (IM) failed...
Paramedics

Local Paramedic Looking Forward to Saving Patient’s Life and Getting No Credit Once Again

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NASHVILLE, TN - 26-year-old paramedic Josh Langhorn is looking forward to his upcoming Friday night shift.  One of the highlights of Josh's shift involves performing life-saving procedures in...