Emergency Medicine

Overdose Victim Mutters ‘Don’t Give Me Narcan’ as Medics Arrive on the Scene

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SEATTLE, WA - Emergency medical services (EMS) told reporters yesterday that they received another call to Ned Smith’s residence, a local ER frequent flyer, after neighbors...

Surgeon General to Reverse Opioid Epidemic with Whopping Dose of Narcan

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - Acting Surgeon General Sylvia Trent-Adams has unveiled a new strategy against the nation's opioid epidemic, and it simply involves giving the...
EMS

EMS Company Offers Subscription-Based Service

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INDIANAPOLIS, IN - Accessible Ambulance, a local EMS company, will soon roll out a new way to provide care for the greater Indianapolis community...
pulmonary fellow

Patient Surprised to Learn Zombie Doctor Not in Costume

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HOLTON, KS - An area woman, recently treated in a rural Kansas emergency room on Halloween was surprised to learn that her zombie doctor...
septic colonized keyboard

Breaking: Colonized Computer Keyboard Finally Becomes Septic

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LOS ANGELES, CA - Gomerblog has learned that a computer keyboard colonized with a whole host of microorganisms at the nurses station on Unit...
rectal exam glove

Rectal Exam Nuisance: New Product Changing the Way We Look at Cheeks

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MIAMI, FL - A new product by Telameto Corporation has emergency practitioners cheering for joy.  The inefficiencies of the rectal exam will quickly be...
happy hour for health care workers

Hospital Enacts New Mandatory Happy Hour for Employees

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BOSTON, MA - "Go figure out the best way to improve patient safety and medical care at our hospital," was the charge that CEO of...

Friday Afternoon Clinic Patient Surprisingly Sent to the Emergency Department

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SAN FRANCISCO, CA – The emergency department at Queen’s Hospital had a very rare event occur this Friday afternoon.  74-year-old Wilma Gooding, checked into the emergency...

Doctor Wins Lottery: Patient List Free of Jerks, A**holes

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NEW YORK, NY - Internal medicine physician Damien Sharp won the medical equivalent of a lottery jackpot today: his patient list is completely devoid...
common cold

Antibiotic Cures Common Cold Virus

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PHOENIX, AZ - Doctors in Arizona have discovered a revolutionary cure to the common cold.  On October 1, John Sniffles entered the emergency department at...