Emergency Medicine

registered nurses

Memes, Memes, and More Medical Memes

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hospital crash cart

Updated 2016 Hospital Crash Cart Recommendations

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ATLANTA, GA - The crash cart is indispensable during cardiopulmonary arrest.  However, their contents are not standardized.  In a much needed remedy to this...
times square work note

Work Note Center Opens in Times Square, Deadbeats Rejoice

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NEW YORK, NY – What’s all the commotion in Times Square?  Not another Naked Cowboy, it’s the new Walk-In Work Note Center.  Based on...

Hotelier Recommendations for Emergency Department “Improvement”

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Due to increasing pressure on administrative staff to correct for their hospital’s Press Gainey deficit, administrator Eagerpants McGee of New York City Hospital unveiled...
arterial line circle of willis CPR emergency department butthurt audacity code shift change prior authorization otherwise stable

Breaking: CPR Requires Prior Authorization

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WASHINGTON, D.C. - In breaking news that will infinitely complicate the already difficult process of attempting to resuscitate a patient, cardiopulmonary resuscitation (or CPR)...
patient survey

Nurses, Doctors Fight Back with New Health Care Practitioner Satisfaction Surveys

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NEW YORK, NY - Sick and tired of the unfair nature of patient satisfaction surveys that puts service above disease management, a multidisciplinary team...
matt lauer er switch

ER Installs ‘Reverse Matt Lauer’ Switches to Lock Drugseekers Out

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NEW YORK, NY – Inspired by the Today Show’s Matt Lauer’s desk switch that locked his door entrapping his victims, Emergency Room’s across the...

Trump Tweets About Several Medical Specialties

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Trump is at it again.  This time it involves tweets regarding several medical specialties. Enjoy! ...

Music Review: Radiohead’s Clinic A

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Rating: 4.5 out of 5 QRS Complexes The opening track is called “Everything is AV-Paced.”  It is an adventure in arrhythmia, with drummer Phil Selway...
red blood cells

Breaking: Patient Taking Blood Thinner to Keep Blood Thin!

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KEARNEY, NE - Kind Humanitarian Hospital's Dr. Naya Statin was in for a revelation when gathering medication history from a new patient Gabby Pentin. "I see that...