Emergency Medicine

ER Catchphrases Guaranteed to Get Consultants to Come into the ER

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LAS VEGAS, NV – Last Friday was the conclusion of the 18th annual meeting of the High-rolling Emergency Medicine Physicians (HEMP) association. Aside from...

By Popular Overdose Demand: Activated Charcoal Smoothie at Your Local ER

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HARTFORD, CT - Get those Press-Ganey scores up with the new Activated Charcoal Smoothie! With the number of intentional and unintentional overdoses skyrocketing across...
hospital casino

Las Vegas Hospital Expands into Luxury Resort and Casino

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LAS VEGAS, NV - In a bold new plan to increase hospital revenue streams, hospital administrators at Las Vegas Medical Center have teamed up with...
pregnancy test

Pregnant Patient Further Shocked When Told NuvaRing Not Meant to Be Worn on Finger

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MOBILE, AL – Fighting back tears at a press conference last Saturday, Lisa Marie Bamberger told reporters she was “stunned with disbelief” in regards to...
medical consult

What ‘Thank You for the Interesting Consult’ Really Means, Part 1

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Initial consult notes usually end with the following line: Thank you for the interesting consult.  What does that really mean?  In the first of...
natural dilaudid spring

Natural Dilaudid Spring Discovered in Alps; Drug Seekers Scramble for Climbing Gear, Airline Tickets

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GRINDELWALD, SWITZERLAND - A quaint Swiss town is experiencing the first wave of what is sure to be an epic boom in tourism this...

Hospital Enacts New BYOD Policy: Bring Your Own Dilaudid

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NEW YORK, NY - With patients treating hospitals like an a la carte restaurant or 5-star luxury hotel, hospital leaders at New York Medical...
zdoggmd

‘Butthurt by ZDoggMD’ Added as New ICD-10 Diagnosis

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LAS VEGAS, NV - Emergency departments everywhere have been experiencing a new epidemic sweeping into their triage rooms recently.  Diagnosis: Butthurt.  That’s right, butthurt...
ativan diffuser

The Makers of the Ativan Diffuser Announce Ground Breaking New Product

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Capitalizing on their previous success throughout the healthcare world by the H-Vape 86, the makers of the Ativan Diffuser have begun selling their new...
United Airlines endotracheal tube

United Airlines Replaces Oxygen Masks with Endotracheal Tubes

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CHICAGO, IL - No stranger to controversy, United Airlines has thrown itself into the headlines once again by announcing that it will be replacing...