Emergency Medicine

coughing

As Nurse Leans In for a Listen, Patient Can Think of No Better Time...

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BOSTON, MA - As Nurse Ned Franks leans in with a stethoscope to listen, patient Andy Charles can think of no better time today than right...

Psychiatric Screamers to Replace Screeners in ERs

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Given the continued emphasis on cost cutting, implementing effective measures, and streamlining services in healthcare, some cutting-edge emergency departments are moving from their usual...
Delta WiFi bicarb

Breaking: Code Team Resuscitates Flatlining WiFi Signal on Delta Flight

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DELTA 1554 - Progressively becoming more altered and unresponsive as the flight from Los Angeles to Atlanta climbed towards cruising altitude, the Atlanta-based Delta...
Waiting Room

Tired of Waiting, Patient Develops “Chest Pain” in ER

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ARLINGTON, VA – 32-year-old patient George Hightower rolled his ankle playing basketball this Saturday afternoon.  He went to the ER only after much persuasion from friends to...
endotracheal tube cough suppressant

Study: The Most Effective Cough Suppressant is an Endotracheal Tube

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BOSTON, MA - Cough drops for a cough?  Not so fast.  An illuminating new multicenter, randomized-controlled, quintuple-blinded study in the New England Journal of...
U.S. economy crashes ICU

Breaking: U.S. Economy Crashes, Transferred to ICU

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NEW YORK, NY - Gomerblog has learned that the U.S. economy is crashing and is no longer stable for the medical floor.  It has...

Overdose Victim Mutters ‘Don’t Give Me Narcan’ as Medics Arrive on the Scene

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SEATTLE, WA - Emergency medical services (EMS) told reporters yesterday that they received another call to Ned Smith’s residence, a local ER frequent flyer, after neighbors...
joint commission

Joint Commission Mandates New Pain Scale That Goes to Infinity

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OAKBROOK TERRACE, IL - The Joint Commission believes that when a patient has “20 out of 10 pain” it isn’t the patient’s fault, it’s...
Barolo tap

Intern Fails at Champagne Tap, More Like Barolo Tap

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ATLANTA, GA - Internal medicine intern Timothy McDuffy's quest to perform a lumbar puncture (LP) in which there are zero RBCs in the first...
An alcoholic dream

Alcoholic Fills Out Negative Patient Survey for Care Received on Christmas Morning

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NEW ORLEANS, LA - 52-year-old Milton Applewood, a raging alcoholic who visits Holy Cross Hospital on a weekly basis, was appalled at the medical...