Amateur Tightrope Walker Looks Forward to First Level I Trauma Visit
KANSAS CITY, MO - 28-year-old Taylor Jasper, a banker by trade who just came across tightroping just days ago, told those closest to him...
Music Review: Radiohead’s Clinic A
Rating: 4.5 out of 5 QRS Complexes
The opening track is called “Everything is AV-Paced.” It is an adventure in arrhythmia, with drummer Phil Selway...
Hospital Installs Shock-Paging System, Morale Soars
NORTH CAROLINA - Doctors and nurses are seeing unprecedented highs in morale and productivity three weeks after Our Lady of Perpetual Dispo Hospital installed...
Narc Madness
It's that time of year, time to pick your favorite narcotic and see if it will make it to the final 4! This year...
ED Places CT Scanners at Entrance
COLUMBIA, SC - “It was bound to happen,” said the Chief of Emergency Medicine, Dr. Sendtu Fleur, “sooner or later, we all knew it...
Hospital Administrators Chastise Emergency, Surgical & Medical Staff for Patient Satisfaction Scores Lagging Behind...
BOCA RATON, FL - Staff from three departments - Emergency, Surgery & Internal Medicine - received scathing criticism from hospital administrators at today's monthly meeting...
Hospital Replaces Crash Carts with Snack Carts
MARIETTA, GA – Goodbye defibrillators and hello Swedish Fish! In a rare display of unity, hospital administrators and health care personnel at Marietta Medical...
Elephant Complains of Chest Pain ‘Like a Human Sitting on My Chest’
NEW YORK, NY - At approximately 6:00 AM this morning, a local elephant named Eli the Elephant developed excruciating ten out of ten chest...
Glass Candy Bowl Filled with Assortment of Antibiotics, Steroids, and Narcotics Available at ER...
HANOVER, NJ - Many might remember the ER that became famous in 2014 for placing a free bowl full of percocets in their waiting...
Study Shows Direct Relationship Between Teddy Bear Size and Dilaudid Dose
ATLANTA, GA - A cute, little, fuzzy study published today in the New England Journal of Stuffed Animals (NEJSA) has revealed something that healthcare...