Commentary: Percocet Doesn’t Work for Me Because It Has Tylenol, and Tylenol Doesn’t Help...
Thanks but no thanks. Percocet (oxycodone/acetaminophen) doesn’t work for me. Why? Isn’t it obvious? You’re the one with the medical degree and you don’t...
Bed-Bound, Demented 89-Year-Old Successfully Resuscitated, Discharged to Wallow in Own Excrement at Nursing Home
GREENSBORO, NC - A team of physicians, nurses, and support staff is being lauded for its efforts in saving the life of Jasper Billings,...
Family Guy Teaches Us About the Wonders of Ipecac
Ipecac was once a remedy in the event of accidental poisonings. In this classic episode of Family Guy, Peter, Stewie, Chris & Brian show us why...
After-Christmas Special: Buy a Hoverboard, Get a Free Visit to the ED
Emergency departments all across the globe are swamped in what can only be deemed as the best deal in holiday history. Thousands of men,...
Area Lactose-Intolerant Holistic Practitioner Has Severe Lactic Acidosis
SEPSIS BUNDLE HOSPITAL, CO - Area holistic practitioner Suzi Budzinsky-Donnitz-Sham-Meyers CPA, PhD, RN was unfortunately hospitalized today. While she has been severely lactose intolerant for...
ER Doc Closes Papercut with 14 Stitches to Protect Gang Member’s Street Cred
Los Angeles, CA- Jose “Mierda Verde” Sinhuevos is one of the most feared member of the West Hollywood Nacho Libre Street gang.
Last week while...
FDA Approves 55-Hour ENERGY for Incoming July Interns
WASHINGTON, DC - In a major win for soon-to-be-exhausted incoming July interns at residency programs across the land, the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) has...
Work Note Center Opens in Times Square, Deadbeats Rejoice
NEW YORK, NY – What’s all the commotion in Times Square? Not another Naked Cowboy, it’s the new Walk-In Work Note Center. Based on...
Emergency Department Offers Daily Specials: Revenue Skyrocketing
RALEIGH, NC - The competitive and creative business of healthcare and medical treatment has suffered in the US due to the unsustainable and skyrocketing...
New Voice Recognition Software ‘Dragroan’ to Dictate Physicians’ Exasperated Groans & Sighs
SILICON VALLEY, CA – Speech recognition software company Dragon, used by doctors and other professionals worldwide for transcription, announced the launch of a new...