Emergency Medicine

Pez Introduces New Pocket Percocet Dispenser

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EAST ORANGE, NJ - The Pez candy company announced its first upgraded dispenser design in decades last week, as the candymaker looks to tap...
registered nurses

Memes, Memes, and More Medical Memes

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Super Bowl party AMA Dilaudid

What, No Dilaudid?! Guests Leave Super Bowl Party AMA

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ATLANTA, GA - Stating that the party spread of salads, sandwiches, guacamole, cheese and pepperoni pizza, wings, burgers, hot dogs, and fried chicken simply...
social media

Hospital Reimbursement to Reflect Number of Positive Posts on Social Media

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Mr. Smith had just been discharged from his local hospital after a 6-day stay for detox, anxiety, failure to thrive, and chronic pain.  He...
ER phone line

Nursing Advice Line Renamed ‘Go to ER’ Line

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CHICAGO, IL - In a stunning announcement today, leadership at the Association for Telephonic Nurse Advisors reported that effective June 1st their flagship "Nurse...

Local Hospital Has New Policy: Ask for Dilaudid, Get Dilaudid, No Questions Asked

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COLUMBUS, OH - A local hospital is trying a new, controversial but more efficient approach to medical care.  “We have changed our guidelines, if you...
emergency room physician

Emergency Medicine Society Recommends a Rectal Exam to Rule-Out Back Pain

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CLEVELAND, OH – New 2016 guidelines on diagnosing pain in the emergency department were released last month and already US hospitals are seeing the...
etoh levels

Unit Secretary Wins Nightly ETOH Pool

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HOLLYWOOD, CA – Emergency room secretary Lois Mare won the nightly ETOH pool at Topanga Memorial Hospital last night. Her winning guess of 433...
emergency room patient

Local Drug Seeker Discovers That 8/10 Pain Gets The Same Amount of Pain Meds...

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Long-time drug seeker, Kyle Smith, recently discovered that stating his pain is 8/10 instead of the typical 12/10 gets him the same amount of...
turkey sandwich haldol diets

Know Your Hospital Diets

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It can be confusing telling apart all those different hospital diets, so here's a primer to break down some of the most common ones. Clear...