July Interns Play Crucial Role During Cardiac Arrest by Whimpering, Sucking Own Thumb
ROCKFORD, IL - Fresh-faced July intern Becky Anderson proved to be the most crucial health care provider present during a cardiopulmonary arrest called at...
Breaking: Buick Undergoes Surgery for Glove Compartment Syndrome
ATLANTA, GA - Stuffed to the gill with unpaid parking tickets and losing Lotto tickets, a Buick in the hospital parking lot is undergoing...
It’s All Good: Avocado Toast More Effective Than Steroids in the Treatment of Septic...
NEW YORK, NY - The most important publication since the release of the Sepsis-3 guidelines, a multi-center trial led by a team of physicians...
Off-Service Intern Writes Pulitzer Prize Winning Provider Note While EM Resident Sees Thirty Patients
“I just want to get the voice right,” said brand-new internal medicine resident Dr. Joseph Green. “Like, I want to paint a picture of...
Pokémon Go Update: Snorlax Found Down, Intubated
ATLANTA, GA - Anesthesiologist and Pokémon Go addict Tobey Matthews was using augmented reality to explore life on the other side of the anesthesiology...
EpiPen Users Develop Shock Over EpiPen Prices: Treatment, More EpiPens
WASHINGTON, DC - Numerous cases of EpiPen Price Gouging Shock (EPGS) are sweeping the nation after EpiPen prices continue to be hiked up by...
Canadian Medical Association Creates Clinical Decision Rules on When to Use Clinical Decision Rules
ALBERTA, CANADA - After the Annual General Meeting of the Canadian Medical Association this summer, a majority motion is pushing a new initiative to...
U.S. on COVID-19: “Help Me, Obi-Wan Kenobi, You’re My Only Hope”
TATOOINE - While cleaning his new R2-D2 droid after purchasing them from the Jawas, Luke Skywalker accidentally triggered a holographic recording of a desperate...
