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NEW ORLEANS, LA – Well, the weekend is over and it’s the start of a new work week.  For Tulane psychiatrist Curtis Loder, his Monday schedule has once again been frontloaded with patients who have either uncontrolled bipolar disorder or active psychosis, leaving him no choice but to agree with The Bangles: “It’s just another Manic Monday.”

“I wish it was Sunday,” Loder groaned, stating that Bangles’ lead vocalist Susanna Hoffs was right.  Loder slams the mouse on his desk when he realizes he’s contending with a slow computer thanks to a poorly-timed upgrade by the IT department.  What Loder appreciates about Sunday is that he is at home and not with patients.  “I mean… That’s my fun day, my I-don’t-have-to-run day.”  He pouts.

Loder has already requested that three of his patients be sent to the inpatient psychiatric unit for further evaluation and management.  It’s not even lunchtime.

“These are the days when you wish your bed was already made,” Loder added, trying to stuff his face with graham crackers and old leftovers sitting in the clinic fridge since Friday.  Moments later, he bellows out when big dollops of both ketchup and mustard stain his shirt and necktie.  He sighs yet another defeated sigh.  Our Gomerblog team asked him why he was so upset.  “Cause it takes me so long just to figure out what I’m gonna wear,” he replied.  “It’s just another Manic Monday.”

Concerned over Loder’s well-being, our team asked Loder’s secretary and his staff what we could do to cheer him up.  They looked at each other and smiled.  “Close your eyes, give me your hand, darling…”

Frankel walked us over to the middle of the break room and we opened our eyes.  Everyone else started making strange but familiar movements.  “How to cheer Dr. Loder up?  Walk like an Egyptian.”

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Dr. 99
First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.
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