Big Bad Wolf

Wolf Huffs and He Puffs and He Blows Anesthesia’s Drapes Down

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LONDON, ENGLAND – A confrontation has broken out between the Big Bad Wolf and anesthesiologist James Halliwell in OR 5 of London Bridge Medical Center.

“Anesthesia, Anesthesia, let me in!” the Big Bad Wolf threatened, facing Halliwell’s drape.

“No!” Halliwell replied. He took a break from his sudoku, as this required his undivided attention, unlike the case he was running. “Not by the hairs on my chinny chin chin!”

The Big Bad Wolf wasn’t having it. “Then I’ll huff and I’ll puff and I’ll blow your drapes down!”

The Big Bad Wolf wouldn’t have stood a chance if Halliwell put up an epic Grossman-style drape fort. Unfortunately, he had a simple standard single drape setup. There was a good chance it would come down.

The Big Bad Wolf blew Halliwell’s drapes down.

But the story doesn’t end there, kids. If there is one thing scarier than a wolf with immense hunger, it’s an anesthesiologist with downed drapes.

Halliwell tackled the Big Bad Wolf, hopped on his back, and blamed him. A few induction agents and an endotracheal tube later, the Big Bad Wolf wasn’t big or bad any more. In fact, he was asleep.

The Three Little Pigs entered the OR and begged Anesthesia to pull the plug.

The end.

Moral of the story: Never mess with Anesthesia’s drapes.

  • Dr. 99

    First there was Dr. 01, the first robot physician, created to withstand toxic levels of burnout in an increasingly mechanistic and impossibly demanding healthcare field. Dr. 99 builds upon the advances of its ninety-eight predecessors by phasing out all human emotion, innovation, and creativity completely, and focusing solely on pre-programmed protocols and volume-based productivity. In its spare time, Dr. 99 enjoys writing for Gomerblog and listening to Taylor Swift.

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